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Some minor spoilers for the end of the U.S.S. Constitution story


Finished with the Constitution. Didn’t see that coming. Laughed, then thought, then decided that was a cool quest.

Cuz the thing he says. “We’re a quarter fathom closer to the ocean! At this rate, we’ll be there in 100 years!” Which is a joke….but isn’t. We talked on how they’re still fighting dumb wars that ended long ago in the name of America. Now they’ve done what they wanted. They’ve completed the quest. And what’s happened? They’ve busted up another building, they’ve committed to 100 more years of their futility, and they THINK they’re being heroic.

Add to that the fact they chided me for killing scavvers. “We didn’t want anyone killed.” Here they are, sending me on one action sequence after another, telling me to fire cannons….and yet they THINK they can do all this, be all “heroic,” without actually killing anyone or doing anything immoral.

If all that ain’t a metaphor, what is?

So I laughed. Then felt bad that I laughed. Then felt bad for supporting them.

I wonder what would have happened if we had sided with the scavengers.

Then I found bunker hill, couldn’t find this Kessler they’re talking about, found some dude’s hat, called it a day.

I think I’m going to go do some BoS stuff next.


Seriously…at this rate, maybe they’ll make it to the ocean at some point, and be able to continue fighting this war. Although if ‘Americans’ don’t really exist anymore, it’s hard to believe ‘Chinese’ do either, so I’m not sure how they’ll identify the enemy, but…I suppose that’s really the least of their problems.

Everyone sides with the amusingly warlike robots instead of the boringly warlike human scavengers. We shall never know what the scavengers would have done!

I don’t think the robots chided me for killing people. When I stole the chip I just ran off instead of fighting the scavengers, and then I didn’t run into them again until they attacked the ship while we were trying to get the last piece in to start the engines. Then all the robots were fighting them, so I fought them too…I don’t remember Ironsides specifically lamenting their deaths.

I was at Bunker Hill, but it was night and no one was awake, so I didn’t hear anything about Kessler. Or any dude’s hat. I’ll clearly have to go back.


Yeah, but, in extending the metaphor, they don’t seem to care. They’ll just keep knocking down buildings looking. I mean, the US has been saying “Is this a terrorist/communist/whatever” for decades, then saying “Meh, close enough.” They enemy is someone, somewhere, and it’s our patriotic duty to obsess about it.

Dude, I TRIED to just run off, but as soon as I touched it they went all nuts on me, and Curie went nuts back. I didn’t WANT to kill everyone. But I did.

And Ironsides didn’t lament, he chided. Scolded, even. Thanks, dude.

The banter is all “I don’t know how Kessler keeps this place together,” and I don’t either, because he must do it from afar cuz I looked for him and found nothing at all. Except a magazine at the top of the monument.

The hat thing is a fetchy for the bartender. No story. Some caps. A hat. You’re not missing much.


True, very true. “They’re certainly guilty of something.”

The scavengers definitely went all nuts on me, but I just bolted. I forget who was with me at the time. It may have been one of those periods where I’d misplaced my companion and was alone, actually. In any case, either the companion with me eventually ran after me, or I escaped alone. I remember I tried sneaking in to steal the chip (didn’t work: even with a Stealth Boy, they still knew I was there), so it seems likely I didn’t have anyone with me, since they would have hindered my efforts to creep noiselessly about.

Anyway, those scavengers were alive when I left them, and probably therefore able to attack with greater vigor later, but whatever.


See, this game is sneaky with its metaphor. As Bethesda games tend to be.

I tried to steal the chip. I did. But there was this ONE guy in there and he kept pacing and ALMOST turning his back….. and then I got bored. So I took it. And he got killed.

Speaking of dead idiots, I did not like having to go back to Corvega. Silly. Especially since it’s so easy now. Took out Righteous Authority, one shot kills for all. And you’d THINK that after seeing seven of their pals beheaded by one shot, they’d STOP charging in with tire irons, but no. No. Raiders gotta raid.


Yeah, that guy never did turn his back. Even when I crept in all Stealth Boy invisible and he shouldn’t even have known I was there. So I just grabbed it, but then I dodged him and ran, shouting “I don’t want to kill you!” and just kept running until they gave up. One thing this game gives you, you’re faster than pretty much everyone you meet.


I wish you could, in game, scream “I don’t want to kill you!” That would be so handy. And save time. Like the Corvega raiders really want that….whatever it was.


I so wish you could scream that! There should be a hot key just for yelling “I don’t want to kill you! Surrender now!”

Granted, that never works when other people scream it at us, but they really aren’t doing it right. Usually they say things like “you might as well give up, you’re going to die anyway,” and that does not encourage the surrendering. I, on the other hand, would really mean it. At this point, I don’t especially care about the tiny XP and boring loot I get killing some raider. If they’d surrender and agree to go live peaceably on one of my settlements, I’d save the time it took to slaughter them all, and they’d stay alive. Win-win! But no one seems open to this negotiation.

Ha–last night I was stalking some synths, and they have their weird robot lines they say, and one was: “Now I understand. You hide because you fear death.”

I was like “YEAH, man! Or lady, it’s hard to tell with synths. That’s so true: I DO hide because I fear death! And it’s working well for me. Now I will sneak over and shoot you from concealment.”


Or, at the very least, “I don’t want to kill you! Let me run away!”

You know, in every Bethesda game, they SAY you can put away your weapon and MAYBE they’ll walk away. This, I have decided, is complete bullshit. It NEVER works. Ever. Sure way to die.

But Indeed! We can be friends! Or, at least, leave each other be! I just want that….thing!

HA! Synths. Or the raider line “Only a coward hides!” Yeah….or a sneaky sniper that just killed 27 of your friends, but hey, if you want to insult me to feel better, go ahead.


Yes, depending on the level of the other parties involved “just let me run away” would also apply.

“I just want that…thing! Whatever it is! I’ll pay you for it even! I have caps!”

I successfully put away my weapon and ended a fight one time. With a caravan guy who was shooting at me because he got caught in the crossfire while I was fighting someone else, though, not with an actual “red text” enemy. I don’t think you can pull that trick on enemies.

And honestly, I don’t get into fights with non-enemies very often, so it doesn’t come up a lot.

Speaking of fights and non-enemies, I did something bad last night, though: I ran into a caravan (well, a woman with a pack brahmin), and went to trade with her, but there was also an option to threaten and rob her. Which I totally didn’t even want to do, but it involved a persuade check, so I clicked on it automatically!

And then she gave me all her money, after which, obviously, she was not inclined to do business with me…so I can basically never trade with that woman. But I got the 26 XP, which I suppose is a treasure more valuable than the small number of caps I might have gained by selling her my boxes of Blamco Mac ‘n Cheese. I feel kind of bad, though. I mean, I didn’t actually WANT to rob the lady, hassling and robbing traders is kind of not my deal (Ms. “Trying to Do Good in the World” that I am), but I just can’t resist a persuade check. I’m so charismatic, it’s taken over my brain! I wield the power of my personality without thinking, for good and ill alike!

Next time I will resist. Unless Strong is with me: I bet he’d have liked that.


Especially deathclaws….

I don’t want the meat! I’m vegan! Really! Nothing but snack cakes! Leave me alone!

YES! That, too, paying for things. Though there are still things I can’t afford…. unlike you.

That red text….

Yesterday, I think it was a glitch, I was getting that dude’s hat, and was in feral ghoul land. I killed them all, and then I see one more, just kinda wandering around. I go to VATS it, and, what do you know, green. So I tried to talk to it. Nothing. Just kept shambling around. Up and down the corridor, like it had nothing to do. Which it probably didn’t. So I left it alone. I don’t hate ghouls. They hate me.

HA! Must….persuade….. Poor trader. She was probably all “Hey! It’s that famous minuteman/settler/hero lady! She’s so nice, everyone loves her, she has mad caps, my lucky day. Hey! Nice hero lady! Over here…….wait……what the FUCK? grumble. That DJ is SO full of shit.”

What companion were you with? Cuz Cait probably would’ve loved that.


There are probably some things I can’t afford, I just never go shopping, so I don’t know. I had 20,000 caps, but then I spent some building stores to make my ungrateful settlers happy. Don’t know yet if it worked or not.

Cait also probably would have enjoyed seeing me bully a hapless trader into parting with her hard-earned coin. Sadly, I was only with MacCready. As noted, he doesn’t seem to care much about anything. If he has likes or dislikes, I haven’t identified them. But he does offer to carry my loot, so I kind of like him.


I have yet to meet MacCready. Who’s that? He’s in good neighbor, isn’t he? So many places……

Cait’s sweet inside. She’s just misunderstood.

A funny aside? I accidentally traveled naked cuz I took of my hazmat suit and forgot to put in the fatigues, and she loved it. She likes getting naked and traveling. Yup. Go Cait.


I’ve accidentally traveled naked, and everyone was too polite to mention it! I’ll have to do it on purpose next time I hang out with Cait. Does she also like it when you take all the clothes off settlers while trying to give them better armor?


She even asked to travel naked the next time herself which wasn’t easy. She was all “well that leaves nothing to the imagination.”

Nothing like running naked in a radioactive wasteland.

The naked thing is even worse when I remember the armor and the helmet and not the fatigues cuz it’s all just over underwear.


I admit I have on occasion left a settler in just armor pieces and underwear when I didn’t have any clothing items that would go underneath armor. Safety first, my friends! There’s still a guy roaming around the Red Rocket in underpants and raider armor, I think. It’s a good look.

Cait probably agrees.

Ooh, the horrible thing I did by accident recently was, I was dumping a bunch of weapons and armor into a pile (as one does) and by mistake I dropped my wedding ring. Noooo! Into a giant pile of other items! It’s so tiny! And yet my character has a deep sentimental attachment to it!

I had planned to leave the stuff there in case the settlers maybe WOULD pick it up and put it on themselves the way we talked about (you never know), but in order to find my ring, I just scrapped everything, carefully reading the text before each item because I was deeply (and reasonably) concerned that I would absent-mindedly scrap the wedding ring. I did find it. Decided probably it just slipped off my finger while I was hurling stuff on the ground…I’ve lost a little weight from all that radiation and living on insect flesh, you know.


Oh dude! No! Don’t lose that!

I’m still deciding who gets the other one. There might be a way to get married. Extra ring, church in diamond city….

Cait doesn’t need any settler. She digs me.

Running around is good for the waistline as well.


No, I wouldn’t assume Cait NEEDS naked settlers, but she might think it was funny. She’s not a fan of…people, really, is she?

I’m not at a point that I’m even contemplating giving a ring to anyone. Sure, I’ve flirted a bit with a few people, but that’s it. My dear departed spouse’s ring isn’t going anywhere.


Get to know Cait. She’s complicated. And well written. And cute.

If she was a sorceress she’d be perfect.