No spoilers, unless you’ve never heard of Pokemon Go and never want to


Caved and got Pokemon go. Now you have to. For the blog. And to keep me sane.


I would, but my phone is like “nope.” I tried! Not enough space. I’d delete something to make room, but all the memory-hogging stuff is locked in. There are about 10 things I never use but can’t get rid of. Google News, Google Music, etc. I suppose it’s what you get with Android. And a crappy phone.

I totally will when I get a new phone. Honest.


Try uploading all your pictures and shit to the cloud. I was down to about 2Kb until I did that, and BOOM. Memory.

Cuz I need you on this one, Femmy.


I deleted all my photos (don’t have music or ringtones or any of that), and still don’t even have the memory to install recommended updates to all the stupid apps I can’t get rid of. My phone kind of sucks.


I’ll say. You must be due for a free upgrade or five.


I don’t have one of them fancy ‘plans,’ so I don’t get your high-falutin’ ‘upgrades.’ I have the stupidest smartphone out there, for $35/month, no contract.

It’s basic, man.


Fine. Here’s your bloggage on Pokemon go: This is the most batshit thing in the history of batshit things.

Sums it up.


A nice, concise summary. I’m going with that.


I know I am prone, at times, to hyperbole.

This is not one of those times.

Oh good Christ.

So the things spawn more often near “Poke stops,” which, to me, sounds like places to get lovely Hawaiian seafood salad (because poke? Get it? Moving on). There happens to be such a stop at a local monument which is maybe 100 yards from where I now sit (which is at my dining room table), probably closer.

This means that, so far, my house is swarming with spearows (not a misspelling).

Which kinda sucks, as I’m still quite skittish about the very real bat that got in the other day.

Now I gotta stress about spearows.

Fuck this game, man. Fuck it.


Oh man. Plus, you’re going to have the place swarming with Pokemon hunters, too.

If only my phone were less sucky so I could share the wonder…