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Some mild plot spoilers for Uncharted 4


Ok, Baby McP did sleep, eventually, so I got to the end of the car bit (I think, I just did the big bridge jump, twice, cuz I missed the first time, and got to listen to all three of them go “no no no no” all the way down, which was silly). I dutifully knocked down every cairn I saw, yet no trophy. There’s always one you miss.

The game totally got me in that last winch bit, because when I was hooking it up, I even said “Wait….this rock, should I be on this side….does this matter? This looks like it matters…..” and fretted about it. That was a nice bit there.

But….that said……

Landing the jump, getting out of the jeep, and Sam saying “Well….that was a nice change of pace…” Self aware game is being too fucking self aware for its own good.

And it wasn’t, Sam, not really. Sure, some driving was fun, and learning the jeep was fun, but let’s not lose sight of the fact that 66% of this chapter I spent sitting in grass waiting for stupid dudes to be stupid. It was African grass, but it turns out that African grass looks (and plays) a whole lot like Scottish grass. Really, this chapter, like much of the last, was long fights with dudes and grass and ropes. Well designed fights, yes, but a series of same, and driving from one to the other instead of sliding from one to the other doesn’t make that much of a difference, really.

I’m ready to take a break from grass for a while here. See me some cutscenes.


Driving, fighting, driving, fighting…all right, it’s a bit repetitive. But the jeep was good fun! I kind of liked zooming around in it. Reminded me of the mako in Mass Effect 2, when you’d go exploring planets.

There should be some cutscenes soon. I think. I kind of forget what comes next, or where the next big scene I’m thinking of falls in comparison to the grass bits.


I didn’t drive the Mako. It was ME 1, which I never did get around to playing. My shame. I suppose when I guilt you for not having Baldur’s Gate 2 in your Bioware knowledge, you have ME1 on me.

Ok, here’s what came next:

Another map room! This one of all the towers.

When I get unbearably rich, I’m gonna hop around the world building map rooms. People will become utterly convinced there is a treasure, because why else would you protect all these maps? And when people get to the end, it’ll be a map room showing where all the map rooms are!

What? Isn’t that what rich people DO? Adventure games taught me so.

Anyhoo, that led to the market and the big tower in plain sight (AGAIN with the plain sight!). Got a trophy for feeding an apple to a lemur. That market was kinda awesome. Felt real. Pushing through crowds, the activity, the people. Even if it did have a tinge of a Sony exec sitting in the room saying “Guys….we need a scene that just shows off the PS4….doesn’t have to do much for the story….” and Naughty Dog saying “Uh….you like lemurs?”

Then did the clock tower, which was really awesome, especially the end falling with the bell. You gotta give them credit. I mean, after four games, they still find a way to make jumping and shimmying awesome. Shit, Assassin’s Creed can’t do that over the course of one game, let alone four.

Then did the match the pirate’s puzzle tiles bit, which went on exactly one puzzle too long.

The whole time I’m thinking “You’re TEXTING? Dude. DUDE. That is DUMB.” Granted, I thought the twist would be that Sam had either been captured or was working with the baddies all along (which he still may be, I trust no one, I didn’t trust Sully for many games, still don’t, still don’t trust Chloe cuz I’m hoping she was lying when she left me…..***sniffle***), but I still had the sense to know that those texts would get to the baddies in short order, and what do you know, they did.

Then I got the “recreate the E3 glitch trophy” Self aware game is SOOOOO self aware.

Then I stopped.

Not a bad day. Good balance. Little fighting, little jumping, some scenes, some lemurs.

But I fear this game is becoming the polar opposite of The Last of Us in terms of momentum. That game, the first large chunk I was all “Where’s why people think this is good story?” then it picked up. This game started so very well, with the Elena stuff, and introducing Sam, and the flashbacks, and all that. Great characters, good set up, great. But now….things seem to have screeched to a halt, or, worse, have become a cliche, predictable mess. I was so into this story, and now I’m all “Yup, map. Ok…jump. Oh great…grass. Bet those text will….yup.”


Oh, right. That was 1. OK, I can always lord it over you about the Mako!

So. I loved the bell tower bit. As you say, it’s amazing how they keep coming up with fun twists on the same basic actions. Here, again, I also kind of appreciated that this enormous complicated puzzle is falling apart…as it probably would after a couple hundred years.

I didn’t even hate the “racing the jeep through the city” part, where I usually hate this type of driving challenge…they managed to keep it just short enough, and with saves in close enough proximity, that it didn’t drive me bonkers.

I basically liked the pirate puzzle, with all the portraits, and I totally agree that they were obviously asking for trouble with those text messages (although it was also kind of fun to have them actually use modern technology for a change. Although on the other hand they usually have the plausible excuse of being out in the wilderness where there’s no Verizon service).

I got the lemur trophy, but not the self aware pause trophy, since I was not aware of it.


And it even started with it falling apart! Here’s this big reveal: the stairs, swirling dramatically upward as you unlock the puzzle after lo these many years….and they fell apart cuz they’re wooden.

I’m sure 300 years ago someone was like “Uh, boss? Shouldn’t we use stone? I mean, wood does tend to rot…” and the designer was like “Oh come on, Kevin, people aren’t so dumb that it’ll take more than, 20, 25 years for someone to solve this….”

See, in this instance, I would scold you for spoilage, because that’s NEXT, except that I KNOW it’s next because that’s the E3 demo that got all fucked up with the pause that I recreated last night. I forgive you. That’s next. NEXT.

SO asking for trouble with the text messaging.

The pirate tiles weren’t bad, per se, but not three rounds of them. Two would’ve been ok. I felt that little jolt of “Hooray! Did it and on to the next…” feeling after the second round, which is why when that sentence ended “….puzzle that’s the same….” was kind of a bummer.

The self aware trophy was because when they showed their E3 demo, they decided to show the chase scene that I HAVEN’T DONE YET. So it started there, with Drake and Sully coming out of the clock tower, looking over the city, and the controller died. Right there, on stage. Dead battery. And there they are, with their flagship game, in front of the world, standing still, getting visibly upset. Eventually, they fixed it, and did the chase scene that I HAVEN’T DONE YET, but if you just stand there, recreating the glitch, you get a trophy called “Stage Fright.”


Doh! Sorry. That’s right, it was after. I’m glad they already spoiled it so I didn’t give away anything surprising.

Well, uh…it’s not a horrible chase. Now you know.


Well that’s good. And given I know it’s coming, I have a feeling I know what newish mechanic you were alluding to a while back. Does it involve jeeps and rope?


Yes, it was the winching! I kind of enjoyed that.

And, as you said, that pre-disaster time when you’re setting it up I was thinking “should it really go around that rock that way? Well, OK, that’s how it seems to go” and then of course disaster strikes. Drake, you need to listen to me when you’re winching!


I tried so hard to hook it up a different way. First that, then me telling him not to text…. Listen to me Drake!!!!

I was thinking about more of a getting dragged thing.


Well, I’m not going to spoil that. I have my spoilage limits.