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Puncherson_64LadyBrain_64

Minor plot and tactics spoilers for Horizon Zero Dawn

Butch:

OK, back to playing!

Went with Varl there and cleared out the metal rings and shit. Took a very, very long time. A lot of it was the sneaking up to the big fight, because it was “sneak, sneak, kill. Look around with focus…shit where’s Varl? How’d he get THERE? There’s WALLS, man! Can I jump over…nope. Seriously, how’d he fucking get there?”

Then the fight happened.

That was hard.

Well, technically it was hard the first several times I died, then it was normal.

I’m doing something wrong. I scanned the damn bellowback, I read about the damn bellowback, it said “shoot it here and here and then it will explode doing a lot of damage to everyone around it.” I said “That sounds great!” And I’m pretty sure the game WANTED me to do that because all the baddies were clustered around the damn thing. I think it was supposed to be a big ball of fire, dramatically consuming my enemies! But I could NOT get that to work! And, what with dying, lord knows I tried. I pumped a million damn arrows into that thing’s components. I tried tear, I tried precision, I tried fire. In the end, I just picked off the dudes and wound up killing the big thing with my spear. Did you figure that shit out?

But kill it I did. Talked to Sona and Varl. He’s a flirty one, isn’t he? In front of his momma no less! Then I trucked out because it seems that “Seeker at the Gates” is the next thing, as doing all this ended a quest without giving me a new one. But I didn’t get anywhere close to the next thing.

All I did was find some of those things with antlers. I overrode one just because, then rode it just because, then decided I was going to try fighting on dinoback. So I took on another antlery thing. It charged, knocked me off my mount, and I very valiantly and bravely and rather confusedly….killed my mount instead of what was attacking me.

Figured it was time to call it a night.

Feminina:

That was exactly my experience with Varl and the rings! Follow, follow, look away at something, look back and he’s way the hell over on the other side of some wall that it took me ten minutes to figure out how to get past. I think he sprouted wings when we weren’t looking.

And I mostly picked off dudes and then waited for the rest of the Nora to hassle the bellowback to the point that it was low enough that I could get it…I never managed to make anything on it explode. False advertising, for sure.

Butch:

Had I not been playing with Jr, who was the one who spotted a very hard to spot climby thingy, I’d still be there.

Feminina:

Yeah, those telltale yellow lines on climbable things are hard to spot sometimes. I wind up wandering around and around looking for them. Which I don’t entirely mind most of the time, because it makes it a bit more of a puzzle and a challenge…there’s nothing particularly interesting about just spotting a ladder and climbing it, after all. But sometimes they’re especially difficult and can become frustrating, and that area was definitely one of those times.

I have attacked my mount, too. “Take that you…robot that was trying to defend me.” Even with the blue lights, it’s hard to tell those machines apart in the middle of a heated combat!

Speaking of overriding machines, I have enjoyed getting a machine, riding it into a crowd until it started fighting, then running off and letting the robots battle it out. If you have a nice herd of striders next to someplace, you can repeat as needed, and it can work rather nicely.

I do feel a little bad about the ones I’m sending to their deaths as my cannon fodder, though.

Butch:

Ooo! How do you hop off? Triangle? That would ROCK!

I won’t feel bad! We’ve been wanting Kevins all along! Now we can have DinoKevins! Living the dream!

Feminina:

DinoKevin! The dream is real!

Yeah, just triangle to hop off. You can race them towards other machines and then slide off mid-gallop and scamper away while they pick your fights for you. It’s awesome. Even if they can’t completely take down something big, they can at least injure it for you.

And you can have more than one thing overriden at once, so you can start one fighting and then run back to get another one and bring it to join the party! I like to get a nice brawl going.

Controlling machines is almost as much fun as stealth assassinating them. Although you can’t ride all of them, so it’s harder to get some of them to fight where you want them to.

Butch:

Multiple DinoKevins! WAVES of DinoKevins!

Pretty soon they’ll be discovering stuff RIGHT AFTER WE DO! Better yet, we just have to look 100 feet from where they’re blowing shit up!

We’re made in the shade.

Feminina:

Hahaha! Just wait for the DinoKevins to be lurking around somewhere, and look 50 feet to the right to find treasure! Love it!

And you know down on that skill branch, you get to override machines “indefinitely.” Plus as we go along we’ll get to override more kinds of machines. So in the end, we’ll just be wandering through the land leaving waves of permanently blue-tinted minions behind us. It’s going to be sweet.

Butch:

And watch…in the next Tomb Raider she’ll be all “What is that metal sound….shit, Aloy…..”

Now I wanna play. But Nooooooo another driveway guy is coming.

Feminina:

“Now I have to fight my way past 50 of Aloy’s DinoKevins to get into that ruin? No fair!”

Speaking of not being able to play, Mr. O’ tried to load Andromeda last night, but was unable to do so because there’s too much crap on our hard drive. So, no report about the dullness or attractiveness of the potential romantic interests.

Man, we need the Pro. At least MY game is already loaded!

Butch:

A whole terabyte of free, free space.

And then you’d just HAVE to get 4K. All the better to see every scale of your brooding lover.

I mean, if there’s gonna be real nudity and STRONG sexual content, 4K it up, man.

Feminina:

Seething with tech jealousy.

And longing…longing for my brooding lover, whom I miss so terribly, whoever and whatever it turns out to be…

Butch:

No need to be jealous! There’s places that sell them, you know….

Cheaper than replacing a driveway, which I am getting estimates to do.

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