Elephants! Wheeeeeee!!!!

Tags

character, children, Uncharted

Spoilers for story in Uncharted: Lost Legacy

Butch:

Two hour delay. Unlikely to have school tomorrow because of ice or something. Life sucks.

But I did play! I swung on ropes, rode an elephant (we’ll talk on that in a bit), took forever to get to a ledge over a door, had an interesting chat with Nadine about how this was really the “women’s city,” (hmm), did a fucking AWFUL fight where there was a dude with a minigun who I kept missing with heavy weapons, and now I’m…somewhere. In chapter seven.

I feel like I’m getting close to the end. I am, aren’t I?

So the elephant scene.

I’m not sure….I mean, the dialog was good, the end “At least we reunited a family” was certainly ripe for bloggage (though I’m still thinking about it), but it was a long ride on an elephant. It was sort of reminiscent of the long jeep drive in UC4, but that was after Drake’s conversation with Elena, and there was much to ponder. There was a lot of “Ok…I’m on an elephant” in this one. Did I miss something?

“At least we reunited a family.” Hmm. Given the family overtones of this game, what do you make of it? Or the picture where she is “in” the family, but distant? Am I reading too much?

And am I almost done? Cuz I don’t want to wander into a boss fight. I’m tired.

Feminina:

Sorry, dude. We have school here as usual. I mean, there’s a previously scheduled early release, but the after school program picks up the slack. Obviously you should move.

But…you didn’t care about the elephant ride? See, for me, this was a total “pause to appreciate the fun and wonder in life” bit. I even mentioned it obliquely when we discussed that a few days ago. I really enjoyed it…it felt like a great, “hey, we’re riding an elephant, this is cool!” experience, and a real reminder that there are other things going on in the world than whatever quest we’re on at the moment. I wasn’t even really worrying about the “reuniting a family” theme/idea, which I took as a throwaway comment and dismissed in favor of going “wheeeeee, elephant!!!!!!!”

Interesting that we reacted so differently.

I wouldn’t say ALMOST done. You’re definitely getting close, but there are a couple more areas to go through first. No fear of stumbling into the boss fight accidentally.

To set your mind at ease, here’s how you’ll know: when you find yourself on a moving train, you’re almost done. Don’t proceed if you’re already exhausted!

Until then, don’t worry about wandering into the final battle. Proceed as normal.

Butch:

Oh no, I cared, sure. I was even worried I missed something, as I hit triangle and picked a branch, and Chloe offered it to the elephant and nothing happened and later she just dropped it. I was like “Was I supposed to feed the elephant?” Especially as the ride was rather long.

I was impressed that they made their concern for the elephant so real. Here are two murder machines, but when they find the elephant, and work to free it, you buy it. It was nice to give them some humanity. They care about something other than themselves. Good scene.

The family thing didn’t register? I thought that was very themey.

Ah, ok. I am very much not on a moving train.

Cuz I figure I’ll need energy for this boss, as it’s most likely an annoying Naughty Dog QTE boss fight. Those always enrage me. I can sorta see why they do it. Making the bad guy nothing more than a bullet sponge can be cheesy, and making the fight “personal” has some resonance, but once you get the trick it’s just a grind. I remember this in RotTR, that annoying last bit where you had to stealth and creep up behind him and look for grenade parts and all that shit without being seen. I figured out WHAT to do early, and then died and died. I wanted to say I GET IT! MOVE ON! but, of course, you can’t.

I hate that. And ND has already done that shit with UC4.

Feminina:

This final battle was actually not that bad. I mean, it is basically a QTE-ish fight as you describe, because they always are in these games, but more like the one at the end of 4 (where you had that swordfight? and it was annoying but at least it was broken into sections so you didn’t have to start ALL OVER every time you died?). I didn’t even spend all that long on it. I was kind of pleasantly surprised, in fact.

So basically, you’re gonna love it! When you get on the moving train, go full speed ahead no matter how tired you are! It’s gonna be great!

But seriously, it wasn’t that bad. If you aren’t totally exhausted, you’ll be fine.

I guess I was just too enthralled by the “wheeeeeeee, elephant!” bit to concentrate on themes. Now you know how to distract me from everything, game designers: elephant rides.

You: So what did you think about the terrible plot holes and completely out of character actions and deep, deep themes in that scene in Mass Effect: Deep Space Desert where you were randomly on an elephant for no reason?

Me: Wheeeeeeeeeeee!!!

Butch:

Now imagine if the elephant was brooding and wearing armor.

Man, I thought we had good stuff to talk about today, and we’re here before the kids are even on the bus.

But the ending, OK. Good. Yes, the sword fight was in UC4. The whole “Let’s add a mechanic you’ve never seen now!” thing.

But I’m ALWAYS totally exhausted! I am so mad at my children.  I am tired of my children.  They NEED to go to school. 

Feminina:

“Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!! I love you so much, brooding armored elephant, let’s make out!”

Yeah, this is getting weird. OK, uh…so. Family. Yeah.

As I said, I didn’t spend that much time thinking about the ‘reuniting a family’ line (“wheeeeee!!!”), but sure, let’s do that. Did the touching bit where the mother elephant found her baby help heal the wounded heart of Chloe, who will never be reunited with her own inspirational dead dad? Or whatever?

Like, human family relationships are messed up and we will never fix them because people are dead, but at least we can help this elephant family find a little happiness?

I could dig it.

Butch:

Yeah, it’s not even Friday. I blame the weather. And the kids.

What was particularly interesting was that Nadine said it. Then Nadine was the one who said “Let me take the picture” (did you do that?) This was her observation, not Chloe’s. You wouldn’t expect Nadine to be the softy. But maybe….

Feminina:

Yes, the picture! That was kind of nice…as if Nadine knew this was going to be a cool memory for Chloe (who is the one taking all the pictures so far) and wanted to help her save it.

Or possibly she doesn’t actually like elephants and wanted to make sure she wasn’t in the picture herself.

Butch:

Nah, Nadine likes them. Remember she was the one who explained the difference between African and Indian elephants. She also likes monkeys, which you would know if you got the Queen’s Ruby.

Game’s got some cool moments, and makes the relationship more than “Two cool women do cool stuff.”

Feminina:

Oh, that’s right, she did explain about that. (I already knew it, but that just shows that I’m a tiny fraction as cool as Nadine.) So she’s into wildlife and such.

Well then, this is definitely about being nice to Chloe. Showing that she kind of forgives her for not mentioning the involvement of Sam.

Elephant rides: bringing people together.

Butch:

You are cooler than Nadine. I’ll give you that.

It’s kind of a cool way to show forgiveness, too.

So…have you started Divinity?

Feminina:

I thought you were going to follow up “you’re cooler than Nadine” with “because it’s 20 degrees out” or something. I would never claim to be as cool as Nadine! She literally kicks ass!

Have not started Divinity. Between having frozen pipes to thaw out, cranky children not sleeping…the mood just hasn’t been there. Maybe this weekend! Or never. It’s hard to say.

Butch:

Soon, man. You have forgotten the therapeutic qualities of games.

I’d be totally crazy but for Chloe.

Feminina:

It’s weird, you get out of the habit and forget how critical and sanity-nourishing games are.

Butch:

You can’t blame home ownership. Nope.

Feminina:

Nope. That definitely has never interfered with anyone’s free time in any way. Never.

But on that note, maybe don’t bother to move here after all: school is cancelled tomorrow and Friday, so you’d be in much the same situation. Wusses.

Meanwhile, I probably have to come to work anyway because it’s not a real snow day. Should be fun.

Butch:

FRIDAY TOO?

Fuck your town.

And you’re complaining about working? TAKE ME WITH YOU!!!!!!!

Oh–Well, we’re cancelled tomorrow. Not Friday, yet.

But the way they do it: A phone call, a text, and an Email.

Cruel.

Feminina:

Yeah, you can’t escape the news. Call every number! Bombard every channel! If they could send messenger pigeons to everyone’s houses, they would.

DO NOT BRING US YOUR CHILD.

You know how they feel.

Butch:

That I do. Boy do I. Yes, yes I do.

Feminina:

If only it were an option to respond with “oh no you don’t! MY HOUSE is cancelled, jerkfaces!” and then disappear.

Butch:

Don’t tempt me.

Do. Not. Tempt. Me.

Feminina:

In better news, the pipes thawed! No sign of a leak. Water running normally. Whew! Dodged that potential tragedy.

Butch:

See? You’re gonna love it.

In even better news, Mrs McP is back on her nutsy diet which means I got like 92% of this here bottle of wine!

Sorry not sorry. Drunk, but not sorry.

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(Dead) People Who Inspire People

Tags

character, children, parents, story, The Last of Us, The Witcher 3, Uncharted

Plot spoilers for Uncharted: Lost Legacy

Butch:

So played up to finding out that Chloe was working with Sam, shot a tank with RPGs, that sort of thing. Now I’m going into a cow/bell/temple with Nadine.

Man, I love me some Naughty Dog, but one thing I do NOT love about Naughty Dog is their insistence on QTE (or QTEish) one on one fights with bosses. This Asav bullshit was bullshit. It wasn’t even all that clear as to what I was supposed to be doing. Irksome.

But I did kinda love the conversation when Nadine finds out about Sam and steals the car because it was true to the characters in ways that some stories with strong women aren’t true to the characters. Usually, in stories, when women lie to/betray/bamboozle each other, the reaction of the aggrieved party is all emotional. Confusion, tears, an exasperated “WHAT?” This is true no matter how the character has been portrayed up to that point. What women generally do not do is slug the woman that has lied to them. I must admit, I was, at first, taken aback by the sight of a woman decking another woman on screen, but then I thought “Wait..why am I taken aback, here? These are two murder machines. They’ve punched, kicked, shot and exploded numerous people here.” And yet, at first, I was taken aback. Because it’s so damn unusual!

But accurate. So good job, game. That was a great scene.

EXCEPT…….

Are we back on the “She’s doing it for a man” trope? Doing it for dad was bad enough…now is she chasing a dreamy dreamboat? I hope not cuz trope.

Don’t spoil.

Feminina:

Sam? A dreamy dreamboat? Um…I guess…if you like grungy, non-angsty types with no heavy armor.

I did think they did a nice job with the character dynamics there. You can understand why Chloe chose to work with Sam (she knows him and has worked with him before), and even why she didn’t tell Nadine about it (beause she knows Nadine wouldn’t agree to come along if she knew), and you can also understand why Nadine hates Sam’s guts and is really peeved when she finds out about it (uh…all that stuff in UC4). And you really feel kind of bad about it, because Chloe and Nadine were having fun together and now the mood is broken, but yeah, both of those characters reacted as you’d expect them to, knowing them as we do, so it all makes sense.

I felt OK about adding Sam to the mix, I guess. I didn’t need him there, I was having fun with just Chloe and Nadine, but throwing another character in is good for drama and witty banter, and Sam is an OK character.

Butch:

Well, more a “dude she may well have a crush on/be sleeping with.” Same trope.

I do feel bad about the argument. Especially as the last scene had them laughing and giving each other lame high fives and starting to care about each other. Oops. Though I figure mood will return. Maybe.

Though I don’t think she has worked with him before, at least that we’ve seen in the games. Chloe was only in 2 and 3, so she knows Nate and Sully. She was brought into 2 by the late Flynn, who blew up. Sam was, we think, still rotting away in a South American prison, presumed dead even by Nathan. Chloe was out of Nathan’s life before Nathan even knew Sam was alive, so where’s the connection?

This will be established later, I guess. Right?

Sam is OK, though part of this feels a little “Well, it’s uncharted, and the masses will expect at least one Drake, cuz Uncharted, and we wrapped up Nathan pretty well, so…..”

Feminina:

Wasn’t there a tiny hint near the end of 4 that even though Nathan was retired from the thievin’ business, Sam was still active, and had some work connection with Chloe as a result? Like, Chloe was looking for a partner and Nathan was all, “No, take Sam instead”?

Hm. Now that I think about it, I may have retconned that in my own brain. I think it was Sully who we saw looking for a partner but going with Sam instead. BUT!–since Chloe knows Sully, maybe HE introduced them, and she and Sam either worked together between 4 and this game, or else she just trusted Sully’s recommendation when she needed someone for this job. (It may at this point be apparent from my wild speculation that this particular point is not addressed in the game. Or if it is, I’ve forgotten it.)

But yeah, there was definitely a touch of “hey, gotta have a Drake in here!”

At least it WASN’T Nathan. I liked the wrap up to his story in 4: I’m glad they let him retire in peace. It would have felt awkward to drag him back.

Butch:

A big drag. That would’ve been just plain cheesy.

Yeah, Sam goes off with Sully. Indeed, you’re left thinking they paired up for good, as Drake’s daughter sees the pictures of Sully and Sam together, older.

Feminina:

Yeah, that’s right…the postcard from Sam and Sully. Well, Sully introducing Sam to Chloe at some point between games could still make sense, since they’re all in the business and all. It’s not completely out of the blue for them to be acquainted.

Butch:

Still.

I keep thinking “Man, you know, this game is pretty cool on the whole feminism front. Even more so than TR, because it lacks tropes, passes the Bechdel test with flying colors, etc.,” and as SOON as I think that, they pull out some “I’m doing it for dead father” (AGAIN with dead fathers! I digress) or “So did you bone Drake” or “Oh look, a man in the middle of the mess” trope. They keep getting THIS close to being real trope breakers….and then they blow it.

Feminina:

But they had to rescue the dude from the middle of the mess! He was a dude in distress! Which is at least a trope-flip, even if it doesn’t completely avoid the ‘a dude must always be a critical component in any situation’ idea.

And he neatly avoids any attitude of “OK ladies, the dude is here and will now take charge, so y’all can finally relax.” Which would have been really, really awkward. So I dunno, I certainly didn’t NEED Sam to be there, but his presence was not a particular annoyance to me.

Butch:

Fair. I dislike the “doing it all for dead dad” trope more. For multiple reasons. I mean, shit. Not only is it SO done, it’s SO done IN THIS GENRE. Lara Croft: Same deal. Fuck, even with dudes! Indiana Jones! Doing for his (inexplicably Scottish) father. Even Nathan was doing it for his (great great) grandfather!

C’mon, Naughty Dog, you can do better.

Feminina:

Yeah, the inspirational dead dad is hackneyed and lazy, I’m with you there.

And with Naughty Dog’s smart style, you’d think even if they couldn’t come up with better motivation than a dead relative, it could have been a dead favorite cousin or something, just to show that at least they KNEW they were being lazy. A dead beloved dog! A dead iconic pop star!

“I’m doing this for you, Frank Sinatra!”

Not a dead child though, that’s as bad as dead dads for a female character.

Here’s the basic inspirational dead relative chart:

• Anyone can be inspired to anything by a dead dad.
• Dead moms are standard and not usually inspirational.
• Men can be inspired (usually to bloody revenge) by a dead (usually murdered) wife.
• Women can be inspired (sometimes to some act that helps others, and/or to scary, weird hermitude) by a dead (usually from tragic illness or accident) child.
• Children and young adults can be inspired to achievements that promote personal growth by a dead grandparent of either sex.

Does that about sum it up?

Butch:

Pretty much. Though see TLOU. Kid dies before the title screen. Though that also plays on the “Men can be inspired by protecting a (usually female) child, who is replacing a dead child (or a child that they thought was dead)” trope, which we saw in TW3 as well.

I’d make a joke about dads and inspiration and stuff, but no. Still clinging to some optimism in the new year.

Feminina:

Oh yeah, the chart isn’t meant to cover everything, merely the basics.

I think you’ll agree that a father being inspired by a dead child, while it certainly happens, is less common than a man being inspired by a dead wife.

Hm…I was thinking of Joel more as a trope-flip than a full trope, but you’re certainly right that there is a long tradition of grizzled older guys (hi Joel!) helping/teaching/guiding younger people who remind them of their long-lost children, and ‘this kid reminded me of dear Sweet William’ is certainly a form of ‘I was inspired by dear Sweet William to notice this kid,’ so you’re probably right.

That being so, I was also going to say fathers inspired by dead children are probably somewhat less common than mothers in the same position, but considering all the ‘reminded ofs’ this may not be true.

Then, too, mothers in these kinds of active roles are so uncommon, there may be just as many fathers (not that there are many fathers either: action/adventure characters tend not to have children) purely because there are more men overall.

Also, wait, why is Geralt inspired by a dead child? Wasn’t Ciri just a child-figure, full stop, not a replacement? Did he lose a previous child-figure in a game I didn’t play?

Butch:

All trope charts are incomplete.

And yes. The dead wife is almost as done as the dead dad.

True. Joel is tropey. Sadly. Even well written games have tropes.

We’re weird about moms. Serious mom issues.

As for the Witcher, well, she “died,” then came back, so it was more of a “I can’t lose you again” deal. She got taken by the hunt in game one, then stayed gone a long time, there was much “She is gone to me…” then she’s back and white haired and shit. Can you be your own replacement?

Feminina:

I’m going to allow it. For the trope.

Such Beauty. Such Wonder. Such Booze.

Tags

making games, story, Uncharted

Minor spoilers for Uncharted: Lost Legacy

Butch:

I saw you online. You’re almost done with Divinity, aren’t you? Don’t rush, as I was all set to charge to the main temple thingy there as I did the last god thing, but decided to go to the question mark. Now I know that the tokens aren’t useless loot! They’re loot that will let me get better worthless loot!

I must have them.

Feminina:

Must have worthless loot! Also booze. I’m right with you.

Haven’t played a single minute of anything, though. O’Jr.’s been on watching Netflix, but not me.

Butch:

Well, I played so I shall muse.

Got all the tokens and the queen’s ruby.

I kinda love that they a) made the useless collectibles a challenge and b) kinda not useless. The little puzzles were fun! Not just jumping for shards. And the reward was something not too earth shattering, but convenient! I liked it! It was the perfect balance of fun, rewarding and pointless. Other games should try it.

And I think it’s really cool that you can turn off the “perk.” That’s also something other games should do.

Off to…wherever next!

Feminina:

Dude, I totally missed the Queen’s Ruby. Mr O’ mentioned it and I was like “buh?” It was one of those times where you’re poking around and find the path forward quickly and go along it without immediately realizing that you can’t go back and poke around more.

So I basically have no idea what you’re talking about, but yeah, I agree! That thing was cool!

I played a few minutes of something called Ecolibrium that I put on the Vita for plane trips and what not, thinking O’Jr. might enjoy it, but it turned out to involve a lot of reading and be a bit too complex.

So that’s what I’ve got.

Butch:

Oh right! Shit! You have a vita!

So the ruby is a thing you get if you find all those tokens. Most of the tokens had little puzzles or stunts you had to do, which is cool.

All it does is make the controller kinda zoop when there’s a treasure nearby, which is just convenient enough to be kinda cool, but not something that really changes the balance of the game in terms of difficulty or gameplay, like, say, an overpowered weapon would. Or even the armor in Horizon. It’s a tangible reward, so you feel like it was worth it, but not one that’s all that important. Nice balance. And the token puzzles were cool. If you’re going to have pointless shit, make it interesting.

And you can turn the “zoop” off. If it bugs you, or if you want to find the treasures without help, it’s an optional perk, which games should do more. Take, say, TR. We bitched in TR (or at least I did) that when you got the rebreather, all of a sudden swimming didn’t really matter. It was without any risk or suspense. Now, if you’re me, that’s great, but maybe there were a lot of people who LIKED the suspense/risk. It would have been cool if you had an option to just keep swimming like normal.

Cool stuff.

Feminina:

Yeah, the Vita seemed like a good travel option, but I couldn’t find any games good for kids. You know, for free and in the half hour I spent looking while I was idly thinking about it. Maybe I’ll find something before we actually go anywhere.

That does sound like a cool, non-intrusive perk. More games should do that!

Butch:

There are enough Vita games that you could look for half an hour?

Sorry. Had to be said.

Feminina:

Well, half of that was spent fruitlessly searching internet fora for recommendations. As one does.

Butch:

In other news, if one more person, upon seeing my thousand yard stare with the kids, says “they grow up so fast” or “enjoy it, it goes so fast,” I’m gonna scream. These people have never sat through a winter break or snow days. Last holiday break alone lasted twenty years.

On the plus side, I played some more!

So where am I? Climbed up Ganesh, took a lot of screen shots, laughed at Chloe and Nadine dissing Drake, got the two cool women banter, got the Marco Polo joke, got shot at by a tank, that’s where I am.

But I’m going to talk in generalities. Because art, often, reflects the national mood. We can look to what movies were hits, etc., get a pulse on things.

We both agree: The world is kinda fucked up. Very fucked up, actually. We’re hanging on to our sanity with game controllers and booze. And yet…

Game protagonists have, for many moons, fallen into one of three categories: a) The superhero who shall defend all from everything because AWESOME! (Shepard, Nathan Drake, every shooter ever) b) the person thrust into a situation they didn’t ask for who is scared and stressed (Hawke, Evelyn, Lara in the first game) or c) the world weary dude who’s seen it all and just wants it all to be over (Geralt, Joel, Lara in the second game). A and C never really change, and B either turns into C (Lara) or breathes a huge sigh of relief at the end with a lesbian elf (Hawke, Evelyn).

But I noticed something the last time I played: Chloe and Nadine took a moment, up on top of the temple, just to look. To admire. To just say “Wow…the world is pretty goddam amazing.” Chloe could even stop to take Nadine’s picture, because, “C’mon, when are you going to be back here?” There was wonder. What video game heroes take a break to just marvel? Well, Ryder. And, early, Aloy. And, even at the end of UC4, Drake.

So we’re on a bit of a roll, here. Enough for it to be a trend. We’re breaking out of the world weary and/or stressed and/or superhero hero into heroes who see some sort of positive wonder and beauty in the world.

Which is kind of odd, considering that here, in real life, there isn’t much of a sense of wonder. Are these games reflecting that maybe we, as a whole, DO have more wonder and hope than we think we do? Or are we gravitating towards these games because our current fantasy isn’t being a superhero or scoring with cute elves, but being ABLE to take a moment to just marvel at the beauty of the world?

Feminina:

There were some good moments of wonder! I especially noticed one bit later where they kind of just have fun with…a thing that happens. That is pretty much just plain cool.

And speaking of Marco Polo, there has always been that tendency in this series, to occasionally pause and make a joke, swim in a rooftop pool, etc. And even in freaking The Last of Us but we got that kind of magical moment with all the zoo animals wandering around.

But yeah, I think maybe this game really worked with that quality of pausing to admire things in the world outside the situation of the story. Which could be the writers reminding themselves and us that there is in fact still stuff to stop and admire, however much things get messed up in people’s lives.

It’s not a new point, but it’s always a valid one.

Butch:

It is cool, and quite the trend in games. Wide eyed heroes. I like it.

And, well, remember the Marco Polo was a callback. Drake insists on playing it with Chloe in 2, and then plays it “by himself” on the cruise ship in 3. Self aware game is self aware.

But dude. Dude. The animals in TLOU were no joke. They were, and you knew they were, the last gasp of Ellie’s childhood. You come out of that cutscene, and you had to pull the stick back when you knew that was the last damn happy moment Joel and Ellie would have. Metaphor. I sat there FOREVER not pulling the stick back because it was fucking depressing.

The Marco Polo thing was a joke.

A valid point, and one that’s new(ish) in games. Shep never admired. Nor did Lara. Sure, they stood in awe (“Wow, the grpnuk peoples of wandragabastan sure did make amazingly intricate traps…the knowledge!”) but not so much just natural WOW at the universe.

Guess they know we need that.

Feminina:

It’s true that the animals in TLOU were not a joke, but they were, I thought, a moment of wonder and rare beauty in that game. And, in a weird way, hope–if not for the characters in the story, then at least for the future of life on Earth in general. The animals were doing OK, man! Humanity may be doomed, but giraffes are chilling!

Butch:

Hmm. Fair point. That they were.

Feminina:

Let us similarly chill in the face of doom. Booze helps.

Now THAT’S Civilized

Tags

combat, images, mechanics, nudity, Uncharted

Minor spoilers for Uncharted: Lost Legacy

Butch:

Played some. Did the “shoot the bells” thing to get a token, then started trucking over to what I figure is the last fortress I need to do before I do the question mark. Figured out that I’ve missed about 928579845 treasures and I don’t care. (Got one, and the list was ALL ????? ) On the way to the fort, stumbled upon Kevins, and, well, you know how that’s gotta go. Killed the Kevins, and took the token they had already found.

And while that was, basically, a kill dudes fight, I did like the subtle twist. We’ve noted that it’s a game trope (one that happened in Uncharted 1-4 quite a bit) that the hero does all this work, and the baddie shows up when the hero is leaving to take the thingy. This time, KEVIN did all the work and we came in when he was done! We got to go all Kevin on Kevin! That was strangely satisfying.

Then got to the fortress, fell in the water, realized that, shit, there is, in fact, swimming in this game and said “I don’t want to do that right now” so I stopped. You know how I feel about swimming.

And I realized that yet another annoying thing about swimming in games is that, once you realize you are in a swimming bit, you have two choices: stop playing, or swim. I mean, you’re in the water. You can’t just turn around and nope it out of there. Sure, you could load a save, but that’s cheesy.

I hate swimming.

Feminina:

Yeah, there’s a bit of swimming. Sorry. I don’t even mind the swimming myself, but I know you hate it like poison.

Oh, also the water is poisoned.

Just kidding.

I did like the twist of letting Kevin do the work. As you said, we deserve that, after all the times it’s happened to us.

“Thanks dude! I’ll take that…”

Butch:

That’s just mean, man. It’s the post-holiday slog. We’re fragile. Be nice.

Next time, I’m coming with an army and fighting just one lone Kevin. So there.

Feminina:

I was about to say I would totally play the game that’s all “hire a bunch of mercenaries and go hunt down Kevin,” but then I realized that BioWare has basically been making that game for years. I mean, “recruit allies,” “hire mercenaries,” it’s the same basic plot. Then you fight the dragon or the big weird guy with the skyhole or the Archon or whatever.

And the point is, that game is pretty great!

It’s not TOTALLY a perfect match because we do always fight a lot of darkspawn or whatever along the way, rather than focusing all our attention on the final goal — Kevin — but there’s some basic correspondence.

Butch:

True. But I want a damn ARMY!

Of course, whether they get there first or last, let’s face it, the army of Kevins always loses in the end. Might take a reload or two, but really, the army is not helpful. Not one bit.

Lone wolves, man. Or partners.

And can Kevin even have Kevins? It’s like Kevinception.

(I’m proud of that one.)

Feminina:

Nice. Very nice.

And it’s true, lone wolves are the way to go–at least in the games we play. Armies are fine, but they do their bit offscreen where we don’t see it or care about it. Obviously if we played MMORPGs where you fight in huge packs, it would be a totally different story.

And let’s be honest, it’s not a story we want any part of, so let’s just stick with the lone wolf (or the wolf with at most three companions along in any given situation).

That’s our kind of story, and we’re sticking to it.

Butch:

Cuz I just added the Kev and…you get it.

It is our story. Granted, I did love Civilization, in which you commanded whole..well..civilizations, but it did lack any sort of blogworthy anything. No story. It was basically a big, complicated version of risk, which is what an army commanding game is like. What could we say? “So…uh…your capital have enough food?” Wouldn’t go anywhere.

And no nudity.

Happy Friday!

Feminina:

Boom! Friday!

Yeah, Risk is OK but I get tired of it fairly quickly. Also, as you say, very poor bloggage.

“And then I attacked Australia and rolled well, but was rebuffed because defender wins ties, and then my turn was over.”

Maybe if the little figures were naked? “I’m sending 500 nude soldiers toward your eastern border.”

MALE NUDITY NOW!

Friday.

Butch:

Well, let’s see…..

Hmmm?

Sexy kinda….

Oh behave……

Feminina:

That’s a start…

Butch:

Damn, we just went there on Civ 5 male nudity, didn’t we?

Feminina:

Dude, I didn’t post those decent if preliminary pictures, now did I? YOU went there.

Butch:

I was merely trying to brighten your day.

Feminina:

Oh, and you succeeded!

You’re a true friend.

Now Accepting Letters for Our New Advice Column

Tags

booze, Divinity: Original Sin, marriage

No spoilers for anything

Butch:

I got nothing.

By the way, you started Divinity?

Feminina:

No, haven’t started yet. Haven’t even taken off the plastic wrapper. It occurred to me that since Mr. O’ also plays games, we could play it together and that could be either fun togetherness time, or the cause of our speedy divorce, depending.

But the downside of that, besides potential divorce, is that it requires both of us to be there and awake and not already playing Assassin’s Creed, which has been a challenge.

Butch:

Whoa…that would be bold. Very bold. I am very glad I don’t have a gamer wife, so I do not have to ponder such questions.

There’s also the whole pace thing. He’d want to play ahead of you, and you’d miss stuff, and we can’t have that.

Could be fun…would be good bloggage….

I dunno, man. Better you pondering this than me.

Feminina:

Yeah, it’s a puzzler. Could be an interesting new perspective! Or maybe we’d just never actually play it because we can’t coordinate our schedules.

Tune in next week or whenever for the next chapter in this exciting drama!!!!!

Butch:

You gotta commit, man. Once you start, that’s pretty much it. Then you have to play the whole thing together, or one of you misses some stuff, then the other misses stuff….and it’s rated as a 75 hour game, which, for us, is like, 90. Shit, they said Horizon was 60, and I was 75 and 89% complete.

It’s one thing to commit, in your marriage vows, to a lifetime of romantic loyalty. But to commit to 90 hours of synced, cooperative playtime? I’m not sure anyone can do that.

Feminina:

It’s true. It’s a big step to take and that’s a lot of time. I’m a little nervous about it myself.

Butch:

This is why marriage works. Compared to gaming promises, it isn’t much of a promise at all.

T SHIRT!!!!!!

Feminina:

New business idea: relationship advice!

Butch:

We’d likely be better at pear brandy and burlap lingerie.

Though Mrs. McP does like our shirts. She points out that less funny shirts sell, and they’re very “in.” She says etsy. Mrs. McP believes you can sell anything on etsy. She is currently obsessed with etsy.

Our relationship advice would be “Dudes, if you can’t fix it with booze, just give up and play games.”

Which is either really bad advice or really good advice. Can’t decide.

Feminina:

Hm. Yeah, that’s a tough call. Maybe good or bad depending on the specific person?

Like, bad advice for alcoholics. Good advice for people who aspire to become alcoholics!

Butch:

See, that’s why we’re such a good team. I get the extremes, you find the subtlety.

Sojourn in the Halls of Justice

Tags

character, parents, Pokemon Go, story, Uncharted

Some spoilers for Uncharted: Lost Legacy story

Butch:

Off to jury duty soon, but I continue to have mixed feelings about this game.

Fought through lots of dudes. I love stealth. I can’t help yelling “death from above” when I jump on dudes.

Opened the second waterfall, and….once again….”My father was looking for it for such a long time….”

Sigh.

Because, once again, this is Chloe saying “This isn’t really MY quest, it’s his, and I’m doing it.” HIS. It’s annoying! She’s too cool for this!

Then I figured out the lanterns were little token puzzles so I did the one where you had to swing to pull a lid off a well and she yelled “Horray for Physics!” which made me love her. Found one with bells and I lacked ammo, and now I have ammo, so I’m going back.

Chloe, babe, you don’t need daddy issues. You are cool. Stop it.

Feminina:

Stealth is great. Chloe constantly thinking about her poor dad is…meh.

Although there is the flip side of “I’m completing HIS quest,” which is “I’M completing his quest.”

Chloe is finishing something her father couldn’t, making her clearly, in game terms, way more of a badass than he was. And she is playing it KIND OF cool, neither getting all weepy and “this is for you, dad!” nor getting all belligerent and “chew on this, old man, I’ve reached a place you never could!” which suggests that she’s kind of in a healthy place with regard to her daddy issues, like “yeah, dad always wanted to do this and that kind of made me want to do it too, and I think of him along the way, so here we are.”

Meh. That’s the best I can do for a positive take on it. Basically I agree with you: it’s an old, old storyline and doesn’t add anything interesting here, so it’s kind of too bad they went with it instead of something less familiar.

Have fun at jury duty! It’s gonna be great.

Butch:

There’s a lot of waiting.

That plot doesn’t bring a thing. I just got the “I’ve never been to the states” banter, when she’s all “the things I look for are old.”

Leave it there! Bad assed treasure hunter is good enough.

Let Lara whine.

Feminina:

Yeah, that was a good line. Although you know there ARE pre-Columbian sites, Chloe…people have been around for a while, and some things within the current US national borders are actually old.

Waiting, waiting, waiting. The one time I had jury duty it was all waiting, until about noon, and then they let us go while it was still early enough that I had to go back to work. Thanks for nothing, justice system! At least get me out of the office for the whole day. Sheesh.

By which I mean, I was just glad to do my civic duty and be part of the process. That’s it.

Butch:

I might tell Mrs. McP that I got a three week trial. Take some time off.

Feminina:

Ooh, good call! Obviously, tell her the jury is sequestered and you’ll have to stay in a hotel. Um…with the PS Pro because…they want you to review some evidence on it. Or something.

“Sorry to miss Valentine’s Day, but the call of justice will not be denied. See ya!”

Butch:

I mean, didn’t have to do breakfast, the bus stop…..

Feminina:

That’s gold.

You’re practically on vacation! Come ON, three-week trial!

Butch:

I almost got involved.

“Sit on your bottom at the table oh wait not my problem today bye”.

Feminina:

Good. Good. Disengage and bail is the strategy!

You have other problems today. Like waiting.

Apparently they at least let you keep your phone. When I went (some years ago) they told us to leave all phones and electronic devices behind. I didn’t have a smartphone yet, so I didn’t care that much. Nowadays, it would be brutal.

HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO BLOG?

Butch:

Dude the phone is keeping me sane. Still waiting.

Feminina:

I recommend downloading Pokemon Go. There might be some cool Pokemon around the courthouse. You never know.

Butch:

I got dismissed. Which is fantastic! Cuz I don’t have to take that advice.

Feminina:

Awww…you’re missing out, man.

On a vacation from your kids, I mean! Obviously. Ahem. I have no strong feelings about Pokemon Go. At all.

You’re free, I’m completely indifferent to the fact that there’s a gym raid out there that I CAN’T GET TO BECAUSE I’M WORKING it’s gonna be great.

Butch:

Everything is normal on the Internet.

T SHIRT!!!!!

Fond Dreams of a Parent

Tags

character, children, gender, parents, story, Uncharted

Some spoilers for Uncharted: Lost Legacy story points

Butch:

So I played some. Finished up the bow and arrow temple, then drove to the waterfall. There’s a trophy for doing that drive in three minutes of real time. I didn’t win that. It’s a long drive.

Now…I am conflicted.

The action bits? The swingy jumpy bits? Great stuff. The banter? Also great. But then….

I activated the crank, water flowed, hooray. Success! Bad assed women!

Who then started talking about men. They compared daddy issues. They talked about the Drake brothers. They talked about being products of their fathers (not parents, not mothers, fathers) and they talked about the Drake boys. After all that bad assed womanhood! Like, now?

Didn’t like it. Let these bad assed women be bad assed.

Feminina:

Yeah, this bit was a little like “hey, there aren’t any men here right now, but rest assured, we definitely think about them all the time to make sure they’re here in spirit!”

I do think (unless I’m forgetting something later) that this was the major instance of that happening and maybe they kind of just figured they’d talk about all the men at once and get it out of the way… The dads do come up again in kind of practical terms based on the fact that footsteps are being followed, etc., and I won’t say the Drake brothers don’t come up again, but…I dunno, I think this was the most dedicated example?

And, I mean, there’s nothing wrong with talking about your past and stuff. I like to learn more about characters from their conversation! And sure, talking about people they both know is pretty obvious. And no doubt the writers figured they should talk about people we, the players, also know, because hey, everyone wonders what those two crazy cats are up to!

But you’re right, it did turn out to be basically a “let’s discuss the men in our lives,” session, with, as you point out, the mothers apparently having had so little impact that it wasn’t worth mentioning. Or, I suppose, we could imagine that they both have such great, loving, healthy relationships with their moms that there’s nothing at all to say in what was kind of a gripe session!

Because that kind of relationship between any parent and any child is so, so common and is really definitely positive and not a sign that no one thought to include any dialogue on mothers because it didn’t occur to anyone that mothers would provide any kind of influence, good or bad. Meh.

Butch:

I know! Which was kinda annoying. There was no need for that. We were doing so well with the whole Bechdel test! Sigh.

It is true that it isn’t THAT weird that they gave a nod to Drake. I mean, if you slap “Uncharted” on the box, people are going to at least wonder about Drake. Makes sense. But it was also the timing that pissed me off. This wasn’t a “Hey, we’re stuck on this boat…wanna just have a beer, shoot the shit?” moment, this was right after all sorts of bad assery. This was “Whoo! MAN we kick ass! Wanna talk about the men who inspired us to be this way?”

And it annoyed me.

And yeah not talking about mom…Uh…maybe it was a compliment to mothers? Let’s face it: as cool as they are, we probably wouldn’t want our daughters to grow up to be Chloe and Nadine. “Sure, they’re thieves and murderers and they have casual sex with winners like Nathan Drake, but MAN are they cool!” is not something we’d want for our kids. Maybe this is the game saying “Hey, they probably wound up this way because their mothers, who SO would’ve been better parents, were ignored. Had they listened to their mothers, they probably would’ve been librarians with a blog.”

Let’s go with that.

Feminina:

Ha! I like that.

“Men will steer you wrong, kids. Listen to your mom, get a stable job, blog on the side.”

Of course that leaves out you and your wise decision NOT to encourage your kids to become thieves and destroyers of ancient archeological sites of precious value to our understanding of the history of human civilization. Good dads get no respect, man. Just like good moms.

Because let’s face it, if they had talked about their moms it would be all “yeah, she was a drunk who used to throw bottles at me to try to knock me off the side of the house while I was practicing my climbing, which seemed like tough but loving practice help at the time until I realized she was genuinely hoping I’d fall and die and she could cash in on the giant life insurance policy she’d taken out on me…”

A parent’s ultimate goal is not to be talked about. You know, just do the job without leaving any permanent psychological damage and hope they complain to their friends about the Drake brothers instead of you.

Butch:

Hey, I don’t want dads in games at all. ESPECIALLY good dads. Bad dads get blame and issues and murderous kids. Good dads get blame and issues and murderous kids and killed before the end of the tutorial. A-OK to leave me out, thank you very much.

Not being talked about. Amen, sister. Best to be but a shadow. Think about it. Your average shrink is all “Tell me about your parents,” and then it’s once a week forever. Think if people were all “Tell me about your parents,” and patients were all “Who?” Shrinks would say “You’re cured!”

Parents. Striving for irrelevance.

After all, it beats dying before the end of the tutorial.

Feminina:

Dying before the end of the tutorial sucks. Interferes with our plans to play video games in the old folks home.

Yeah, I think we’ve hit on it: the best parent is one who warrants absolutely no mention. At absolute most you want a quick acknowledgement and dismissal to show you’re alive and not horrible: “yeah, they’re fine. Still playing games in the home, can’t pry those controllers out of their hands, you know? Now about those Drake brothers…”

That’s my goal.

Butch:

Let’s add:

“Yeah, they’re fine. Still playing video games in the home. Buying them with all that money they have which we never ask them for.”

THAT’S the dream.

Feminina:

Boom, done. You’re right, that’s key.

Dream now locked in.

Butch:

“While enjoying the booze we randomly bring them as gifts.”

Feminina:

It gets better and better!

Just be careful it doesn’t get TOO amazing, or we’ll become one of those “and then they tragically died in a console accident one day before winning the lottery” cautionary tales about how you have to be careful not to anger the gods with your awesomeness.

We’ll just leave the details of our daily pie ration unspoken, but understood.

Butch:

Good point.

But shit, Femmy, after the last few days the Gods owe me.

Feminina:

They owe us all, big time. Where do we send that bill?

LOOKOUT! TALL GRASS!

Tags

character, making games, Uncharted, voiceacting

Spoilers for Uncharted: Lost Legacy

Butch:

Well, I’m glad all y’all bought a house because I’m looking at bills and realizing I spent so much money on Christmas that we all have to come live with you. Don’t worry. I’ll bring my pro. Unless I have to hock it.

I kid, I kid. Sorta.

Played some. Climbed a bigassed tower and opened doors and saw towers. Headed off towards one of them and got interrupted by Kevin. You’d think Kevin would know not to interrupt. Killed Kevin, had some chats, found a token or whatever, that sort of thing. Now I’m standing outside the temple/fortress/whatever with a bow and arrow. Parsharama, or something. That’s next.

Some thoughts!

1) Chloe is awesome because she’s commenting on the game, too. When she said “Oh look. Another fortress.” so sarcastically, I could have kissed her. Heh.

2) There’s gonna be a fight by that tower, isn’t there? I know this because there’s grass and places to climb. Indeed, when I saw the grass and places to climb, I drew my gun cuz of COURSE that means Kevin. And no Kevin now means Kevin later.

Can you imagine if it was like that in real life? You saw grass and climbable things and you thought “FIGHT?” I couldn’t get across my yard. TREE! SHED! BUSH!

3) I’m not sure I’m down with the pseudo-open world thing here. I almost took the wrong way at an intersection, because UC games do not HAVE intersections. It wasn’t some “I need a quest marker” deal (thought that would have been nice), so much as a “Wait, what? This doesn’t happen…” It’s a little confusing, and I’m not sure I like it in a UC game. There’s nothing wrong with linear sometimes. More than sometimes.

How was the weekend?

Feminina:

Well, we do have this whole basement that has nothing in it except for about 30 boxes of (probably) rags and spiders. You could totally hook up the Pro down there. We got your back!

Weekend was good, aside from the usual squabbling of children. O’Jr. said this morning, “he likes me, but I only sometimes like him.” So that sums that up.

Although in fact, I think Grigio would also say he only sometimes likes O’Jr., if he had the vocabulary for it. Aw, that precious sibling bond!

When I’m deep in an action game, I do sometimes find myself unconsciously evaluating environmental features…”I could climb that wall, jump to that roof…” and then thinking “oh wait, what the hell, I could never climb that wall! I don’t climb walls!”

Chloe is pretty great. She’s a good character: fiercely determined, but at the same time not taking things TOO seriously. Which seems weird to say, because she obviously takes it seriously enough to go halfway around the world and murder hundreds of dudes, which seems pretty darn serious, but at the same time she keeps a sense of humor and perspective about it.

Which is hardly unique, since the wisecracking action hero is at least as common a character as the deadly serious one, but they do it well with her.

I agree about being a little thrown by that huge open expanse. As you say, it’s not what we expect from Uncharted! It may encourage you to know that once you’re finished with this area (which takes some time), it becomes much more traditionally linear again for the rest of the game. I’m not really sure why they threw this bit of open world in the middle like that, and I think I spent a couple of play sessions just wandering around because I was so confused and I was just looking for the linear path I was used to. I mean, wandering and getting in fights and such, doing stuff I would eventually have had to do anyway, but I kept thinking “was there supposed to be more to that? am I missing something?” because I kept thinking I was going to find that clear path forward that you usually have.

So, I guess, just have fun wandering around getting in fights and stuff, and eventually you’ll do all the stuff you have to do in that area (when I think about it, I guess they just put several challenges in one area, rather than having each puzzle/climb/fight be basically its own contained section, the way they usually do), and then it’ll be back to a more familiar track.

Butch:

Sounds good to me! Rags are comfy.

Every year I’m all “Ok, I am staying on budget this Xmas” and then I don’t. And it’s weird because, as you know, I’m pretty frugal. Not like you, of course, cuz you’re nuts, but I’m pretty good with my money! Except at Xmas. Then whatever.

My friend the beer brewer was at the bus stop the other day, and asked me what I’m playing. We chatted, and I ask him, and he says “This game called Divinity. I wanted to play it because I heard the sequel is good.” So great minds. He says it’s very good, if a little tricky at first. So that’s good. He has very good taste in games. I sense good bloggage ahead.

Oh, someday your kids will set up the same spreadsheet mine have, all color coded to schedule when they’ll like each other, which one will be god awful bad on which day, that sort of thing. It’s how kids do.

I would pay money to someday see you try advenuturing moves. Not to, like, jump over a deep chasm, cuz you’d die and I’d miss you, but to try to, say, shimmy up your gutters.

They do the action hero very well with Chloe. And, my shameless adoration of the characters Claudia Black voices aside, I do think the acting matters. I think we liked so many of the characters in Horizon because they were well acted. It’s SO important, especially as, even with technology starting to blur the line between animation and reality, it isn’t quite there. The faces are still off. They can’t convey what a real actor can. And Claudia Black is just a plain, flat out, awesome voice actor.

I feel exactly the same way about this open space. And order! I’m assuming here, that I will have to do the three fortress temple thingies that have actual icons before I do the question mark one, but hell if I know what order I’m supposed to go. I guess it doesn’t matter. It can’t matter, right? I just picked the one in the bottom left corner because it seemed the closest. I hope I didn’t miss a clue.

But Ok. So long as I’m not going to get to the top of someplace and find out I don’t have the golden weeble and have to come all the way back. Cuz fuck that.

Feminina:

I know what you mean. I’ll just start shopping and think “yeah, whatever, send that thing Amazon! I don’t care what it costs!”

I’d say it’s especially deadly to shop online because Amazon already has my credit card info and it’s the mere click of a button, but honestly, shopping in actual stores isn’t much better because I can just hand them my credit card so it’s barely any different. I guess the only thing that might save me in actual stores is that my arms would get tired from carrying things, or I’d start to think “wait, I’m never going to make it to the post office to mail this in time.”

Good news from your friend about Divinity. Tricky is OK, but we’d hate to have settled on something that wound up being boring and annoying.

I don’t think there’s any particular order you need to do those fortress things in. I also worried about that, but I couldn’t figure out any ‘right way’ and just did them in whatever order was convenient, when I happened to get close to one while prowling around looking for loot and dudes to murder, and it turned out fine.

You keep (or at least I kept) getting that ‘quest objective tip’ that said “reach the top of the tower” and I kept thinking “what the hell, I can’t get up there,” so I just ignored it for a long time and roamed around randomly, and eventually it all worked out.

Butch:

Ah, see, we were out and kept seeing that REALLY cute thing that the kids would SO like….

Danger.

Indeed. We’d hate boring. And it sounds like really old school D&D, which we haven’t done since…well…school. Or so it seems. I’m cool with that.

Ah, see, I did the tower first. It wasn’t that hard. Just a lot of jumping and swinging and shit. And then I opened four windows and updated my map and voila. But what I DIDN’T get was anything telling me what to do next. Just “Ok, Chloe scribbled some shit down, try to make sense of it.”

So I’m trying to make sense of it.

Feminina:

Yeah, true, that’s the danger of shopping in the real world. One sees things, just walking by windows, that one would never think to look up online. Wonderful, magical things!

Ha, yeah, I also had that reaction to Chloe’s writing things down. “Wait, what did you just write, and what on earth am I supposed to do about it?”

But no worries. Wander around, climb some thing things, murder some dudes, it’ll all come together eventually.

Just like in real life!

Butch:

I just did that at the grocery store! I, too, have terrible handwriting, so it was all “Does that say toilet bowl cleaner or deli meat?”

See? Me and Chloe. Practically soul mates.

 

Feminina:

This game was made for you.

Back to the Game!

Tags

character, combat, gender, Mass Effect: Andromeda, story, Uncharted

Spoilers for Uncharted: Lost Legacy

Butch:

Where was I? Ah, yes.

So did a fight by the facade there. Died a bunch, because they kept being all “reinforcements!” which would appear behind me and I’d be all “What? Where? How? I’m dead.” Figured out that sneaking was the way, specifically sneaking to the truck, opening the box and getting the silenced pistol. I love the silenced pistol. Then, no reinforcements, done!

Left off with the line “Back to shotgun,” “I can drive too, you know,” “I know, honey, I just like to be in charge.” I mean, they comment on how the PC always drives in games, and they throw in a “honey.” I love Chloe so much.

Which got me thinking: Yes, I love Chloe cuz BEBHBB and Claudia Black, but she’s different than any other cool female character in games (at least thus far, which is why I’m nervy about the whole backstory. More on that in a second.)

We’ve played a lot of games and met a lot of cool, badass female characters. But they usually fall into one of two categories:

1) The “I’m innocent but learning.” This involves a lot of “Ok..[deep breath] you can do this” to themselves. It usually involves overcoming self doubt. See: Aloy, Lara Croft.

2) The slightly crazy/maybe evil/certainly an outcast. These women are just plain not like other women. They’re outsiders, or bonkers. Maybe they’re part of a persecuted sorceresses guild (Triss, Yen), maybe they’re slightly evil AND persecuted sorceresses (Morrigan), maybe they’re bonkers (Leliana), maybe they’re straight up criminals (Sera). Look at the way MEA described PB and Vetra: “ROGUE academic.” “DRIFTER mercenary.” Different.

Chloe isn’t. She’s just badass. Sure, you can say “She’s a thief,” but not in the overt way that, say, Sera is. She doesn’t live alone in a tavern (we think). She doesn’t cut her hair weird. She’s just an unapologetic thief, like, say Nathan Drake. She’s just a bad ass who sometimes kills for a living, like, say Geralt. The “rogue,” “outsider” angle isn’t forced down our throats like it is in other games with cool women. You never hear her giving herself pep talks, wondering if she can (and Aloy falls into that trope, no matter how much we like Horizon). Shit, when Nadine is all “Do you have a plan?” and she says “Sure!” when you know she doesn’t, the next thing we see ISN’T her being all “Shit, I have no plan…you can do this Chloe.” Nope. The next thing we see is the fall of Kevins.

And that’s awesome.

And it’s why the backstory is even more disturbing. I will be very pissed if there’s a “I don’t know, dad, I don’t know if I can live up to your legacy” scene, thus plopping Chloe into category 1. I hope not.

Feminina:

I do like that about Chloe and this game. As you say, no apologizing, no little self-pep talks, no wondering quietly if she’s good enough, she just goes and does stuff.

I don’t have a problem with pep talks and self-doubt, necessarily, if they make sense for the character (Aloy: young and inexperienced, not unreasonable to occasionally have some nerves), but you’re right that that particular sort of character is much more commonly seen as a woman than a man, so it’s nice that Chloe diverges from it purely as a change of pace.

I mean, we hear her occasionally say “whoa” or shout if she falls, or whatever, but no more than a male character would (Drake yelled a fair amount on tricky climbs).

And I would personally be fine with a young, inexperienced male adventurer who had to give himself little pep talks occasionally and had moments of doubt about his ability to handle things, but you just don’t really see that (because it’s not manly, damn it!).

Even kid-Nathan Drake, back in the orphanage, was way more full of daring and (perhaps unrealistic) confidence than he was prone to nervousness and doubt. I think he expressed some trepidation about a couple of Sam’s big leaps and stuff, but if I recall correctly, even that was more stating a complaint about external circumstances: “come on, that’s a big jump!” than a doubt about himself: “come on Nathan, you can do this!”

Obviously, in real life unfaltering, unwarranted confidence is often not a great strategy, so we’re not holding up either Nathan or Chloe as role models. “Never doubt yourself! Be an international art thief and kill everyone who gets in your way!” is not advice I’ll be giving my children.

But given that it’s a character that works well for a fun action/adventure game, it’s nice that they recognize that there’s no particular reason a woman couldn’t feel just as confident about her legally and ethically dubious goals, and be just as bold and straightforward in their pursuit, as a man.

I’m into it.

I also liked that they’re not completely just “pretending she’s a man.” The fact that she’s a woman isn’t a complete nonissue, which would risk seeming dismissive of the existence of gender discrimination. There’s a small bit in there where she and Nadine talk about some of the times they’ve been underestimated or slighted by men who assumed they couldn’t do something because they were women.

So it’s not a non-issue, it’s just not the main issue. Yes, they deal with some things as women that men wouldn’t have to. However, the important thing is that they can climb ridiculously dangerous buildings and mountains, solve ancient puzzles, and murder the hell out of Kevin.

Butch:

That self-doubting role is ALWAYS seen as a woman. I can’t think of a single male character that fits that mold.

Still the funniest moment in all of those games was one time I drove off a cliff and Drake and Sam and Sully all were all “Shit AAA shit AAA shit AAA” all the way down.

Young man giving self peptalks you don’t see… Ever. Not ever.

I was thinking, a good experiment (that neither of us will do) is to see if the throwaway banter is different in a game where you can play as either a man or a woman. Take MEA. There, sure, it was in character for the pathfinder to have doubts. I figure that the cutscene dialog was the same for a man or a woman Ryder, but there were LOTS of times in the in game self talk was along the lines of “[breath] you can do this [breath]” for the female Ryder I played. I wonder if they included that, as we heard it, for the male Ryders out there. If they didn’t, or changed it to “Whoa, that’s a big drop” (like you mention, in UC4), that would be rather interesting.

Agreed about in-game exclamations… Here it’s far more similar to what we see even seasoned male characters do. Even Geralt, when doing a particularly difficult contract would, sometimes, be all “Shit that thing looks tough,” which, again, is more “Damn, man,” than “Damn it Geralt, you can do this!”

Really? You don’t give your kids that advice? I’ve been teaching mine that since birth.

I’m also into it. I hope they don’t fuck it up with this very unnecessary back story.

Gender discussion–Oh, cool! I look forward to that. Though I’ve already seen some underestimation. Right there, when we first meet Asav, he’s all “Come work for me,” and “You’re no expert,” sort of “putting these ladies in their place.” Granted, he’s a bad guy, but the vibe is the same.

Feminina:

Yeah, I can’t think of any male characters that fit that mold either, but I was hedging just in case someone came along to point out that “oh, well, in this one game this one male character was totally that way.” Because I haven’t played every game (by a long shot), so it could theoretically be out there!

But also, good point about that with Geralt, the difference between “damn that thing looks tough” and “come on self, you can do it.” It’s not that male characters are incapable of recognizing danger! Even, sometimes, when something is just TOO dangerous: sometimes you’ll get something like “I can’t get past these 500 armed guards, better try to find a sneaky alternate route.”

But, again, they tend to evaluate threats as a matter of the situation being too dangerous (“500 is just too many armed guards”) rather than as a matter of themselves not being skilled enough to handle it (“I’m not tough enough to defeat 500 armed guards”). They blame the situation, so to speak, rather than themselves.

Which in this imagined case is perfectly sensible, because it’s no-one’s ‘fault’ they aren’t tough enough to defeat 500 armed guards, it’s just one of those things that comes with being a single human being.

But it would be much less surprising to have a female character somehow blaming herself for not being that tough, than a male one. Or apologizing for it.

“Sorry, dad, I’m letting you down but I can’t defeat 500 armed guards!” Ha.

Butch:

That game could be out there, but I doubt it.

Blaming the situation, not themselves: Right. And even then, it’s not really linked to narrative. It’s linked to gameplay. That’s more the game saying “Hey player, don’t do this” than it is any sort of doubt manifesting from the character. And yet, still, they do things differently, as you point out, based on gender.

I really hope they don’t mess it up.

Feminina:

Oh yeah, 500 armed guards is almost invariably the game saying “now it’s time to sneak,” (which is great! I like sneaking!) rather than any kind of comment on how “there are some things even you can’t tackle singlehandedly so be humble” or similar character-related points.

And back to an earlier point, I’m definitely not going to play MEA again to compare, but you’re right, it would be interesting to know if the ‘throwaway’ comments are any different with a male Ryder than they were with a female one.

Somebody probably wrote that article, but I can’t find it.

Hm…this guy did a video on a few minor differences early on…https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUzk40kX3-0

Butch:

Interesting. Not all that different in the strong/not front, or confident/doubtful front. But certainly….something.

Another thing for us to keep an eye on.

We’re doing well for a Friday.

Feminina:

Yeah, interesting. As the guy said, it’s an incomplete look since he hadn’t gone past the prologue, so who knows how things looked futher into the game. I did see a couple of other comparison videos, but it seemed like more of the same…relatively small differences, kind of a focus on Sara having more of a gung-ho attitude and Scott being a bit more cautious. Which is perhaps an interesting inversion of the traditional gender roles, where you’d expect the guy to be all full-speed-ahead and the woman more careful. But since the writers had to work with the fact that the player could be putting the character’s focus more in one direction than another, it obviously has to be very subtle.

Butch:

This is gonna be one of those things we can’t talk on because we don’t do multiple playthroughs.

Still not gonna do multiple playthroughs.

Nope.

Even if they had nudity.

PHEW! Friday gonna Friday.

Feminina:

Nope. Not gonna do it. If the game were shorter I might possibly idly consider it (I played ME2 twice), but as it was, I just don’t have that kind of time.

There are other games. There are even things to do that aren’t games, I suppose, if we want to get all technical about it.

Butch:

Many other games.

But on nudity (in general), Chloe, as good lookin’ as she is, is rather unsexualized, even more so (less so? whatever) than Lara Croft in the reboot, I think. In that game, we had the sexualized death scenes, kills, etc. Chloe just wears work boots, we don’t focus on her ass, etc. Even in the (rather creepy) load screens with Nadine and Chloe STARING at you (the first time I saw that it was a AAA! moment), they’re sweaty and not wearing make up and it’s just their faces, not their bodies. Even when you open the phone, her hands look like hands that have just punched dudes and climbed rocks. No nail polish, all calloused and bruised. We don’t often see that. Even Aloy looked pretty put together. It’s a nice touch.

Feminina:

True! I noticed the hands when you’re holding the phone. Chipped nails, scratches, dirty, etc. Which, as you say, matches the activities we see her engaged in. It would have been really weird and distracting if she’d had a beautiful manicure or whatever.

Also yeah, I did not notice a lot of gratuitous “hey, check out her butt while she climbs here, ooh, hey, cleavage!” camera angles or anything. Nadine either. They’re just people moving around, doing stuff, wearing clothes.

And, again I agree, the death scenes are pretty much just “crumpled body on the ground” with no weirdly suggestive poses such as the ones we found vaguely disturbing in the first TR.

Good points all.

I must say, it was all rather refreshing.

Butch:

You say a manicure would be weird, but not having it isn’t all that common, really. We’ve commented several times about how Morrigan always managed to find that eye shadow, even in the deep roads. You could even put make up on Ryder! Ok, Aloy wasn’t all made up, but that hair, man. She never had a bad hair day.

But this–Yup. Good stuff. Not the deepest game in the world, but that’s ok. Still good.

That Truth to Which We Cling

Tags

booze, children, chit-chat, health, TV

Spoilers about the challenges of life and the things that support us when times get tough

Butch:

I got nothing. Kids had colds, everyone was crazy, Junior had his thing until five, I knew I’d let Chloe down.

Which is fine, because I have my six month brain check today, which means my neurologist will, once again, try to convince me that something called “laser ablation” with a “proton knife” is something I should do to my brain. I keep telling him that one should only use proton knives against people named Kevin.

Strangely, spending the day talking about brain surgery and sitting around for an hour waiting to get my blood drawn will likely be more fun than the five year old’s birthday party I did yesterday.

At least it’s likely you’ll take my advice on that one. You blew it on multiple kids, you blew it on buying a house. At least it’s likely you’ll take my advice on not letting anyone get close to your brain with a proton knife.

Feminina:

Are you kidding!? I get proton knife laser ablation every couple of months, just to keep on top of the latest! It’s the best. How do you think I finish games so fast?

It logically follows that Mr. O’ has it once a week.

Butch:

I AM NOT KEVIN!!!!!

T shirt!!!!

Actually, you two having regular brain surgery explains so much.

Feminina:

I didn’t want to give away our secret, but sooner or later, the truth comes out.

Butch:

Doctors are always so gung ho. He asked “Why don’t you want the surgery?” I said “Because it’s BRAIN SURGERY.” Like…..one would think that question answers itself.

Anyway, you picked up Divinity yet?

Feminina:

Ordered. It will probably arrive soon.

Also, “why don’t you want the surgery?” is such a great question. As is, “why don’t you skydive regularly?” or “why don’t you wrestle alligators?”

Um…it just…seems like the kind of thing one avoids where possible, is all?

Butch:

His response to my rather obvious answer of (paraphrasing) “Dude….” was “But you say you get tired in the afternoon.”

Look, doc, I respect you, I do, but really, I do not need to risk, like, terrible brain injury and all that just so I can not nap during Dinosaur Train. We are little askew on the risk/reward calculations here, doc.

Dinosaur Train sucks, anyway.

Feminina:

Dude! You’re missing PRECIOUS CHILDHOOD MOMENTS here!

“We’re gonna riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiide the dinosaur train!!!!”

O’Jr. was really into that for a while but then it went off Netflix. Or it was never on Netflix but he went off watching things on the computer instead of the TV? Or we never bothered setting up PBS Kids on the TV?

Anyway, somehow, mysteriously, he doesn’t watch it anymore.

Butch:

Stop that. You get that in my head, I’ll mention a certain holiday primate who’s beloved by children at all times of the year. We don’t want that, do we?

See, there’s this thing called channel 2. It’s one of these old things they used to have called a “television station” that just shows things whenever it wants and you can’t tell it when or what you want to see. It just happens. You don’t have to set it up or get a computer or anything! It’s practically magic!

Feminina:

I’m pretty sure you’re making all this up. Why would people just sit and watch whatever came on? As if they didn’t have many other options for video entertainment?

Ha. I remember VCRs, and it was this big thing that now you could watch a movie ANYTIME YOU WANTED! You don’t even have to wait until it shows up on TV sometime!

I don’t really remember before movies on TV, but imagine that…basically, once something left the theater it ceased to exist. If you didn’t see it while it was in town, you never would.

Strange times.

Butch:

Strange, I know. But then, how else would we have been acquainted with Steve Songs?

Dude, I remember renting VCRs. Not the tapes, the actual VCR. It was like, big, involved movie night!

Movies on TV used to be a big thing, and what was on, too. Your movie was THE THING people watched on Sunday, or whatever.

Feminina:

With who now?

We rented a VCR and movie once! It was a big holiday production. We had to rent the TV too, I think, that’s how out of the tech loop we were in…1992 this was. Yup. A bygone era. I’m just retrospectively impressed we even knew how to hook up and operate TVs and VCRs.

That’s probably more difficult these days, actually, hooking things up, I mean, what with all the cables for consoles and sound systems and internet connections.

Butch:

Dude, things now, you just plug in the HDMI cable. Back then, there were, like, different things and colors and sound cables and you had to twist things and shit.

You still don’t get tech, do you?

Feminina:

Good point. We plug everything into everything these days. But there are SO MANY blinking green lights on that Verizon unit that provides telephone and internet and (if we ever decide to pay for it) cable television! No way that’s not complicated.

Verizon Guy, you hook it up. (He did. It works. Now let us never speak of it again.)

Butch:

You should see my new network. It has two booster points, all mesh, switches from the 5ghz to 2.4 automatically, keeps things that need static IPs static without being told, and I can control it from my phone.

Trust me, it’s cool.

And at least no brain surgery!

Feminina:

At least no brain surgery!

Although dude, maybe you should get the brain surgery now, because in a couple of years if you actually need it, it probably won’t be covered by insurance. Or deductable on your taxes.

I may call and make an appointment for brain surgery myself, just in case.

Sigh. So, did I tell you about my new Pokemon achievements? Only 33 to go before I get a medal for hatching 1000 eggs!

Butch:

Proton knives for everyone! (Extreme weird callback.)

That thing you said about pokemon go is the most depressing thing I’ve heard all week.

I think “At least no brain surgery!” is the T SHIRT we retire on.

Feminina:

It’s hard to beat that shirt.

Or that callback! Which is awesome! Although sadly I think the thing it calls back to predates the blog, so no one could possibly get it. [Sorry, everyone.]

Not that anyone probably gets half the weird things we say, so come to think of it, no worries there. [Sorry, everyone!]

Butch:

See? I pay attention. Even to pre-blog wit!

Feminina:

Well, who could forget the immortal beauty of “Knives! Knives for everyone!”

Which goes all the way back to AC: Brotherhood, in the mists of time. When that game was so, so good.

You don’t share my fond memories of the game, but you remember the catchphrases. That’s true friendship.

We must cling to the thought of what is good and true and beautiful in the world, i.e. video games, to see us through these dark times.

Hm.

Butch:

And booze. Let’s not forget booze.

Feminina:

Yes, definitely booze.

And, you know, the merry laughter of our children and the loving smiles of our spouses and the ties of fond memories that unite us with family and friends etc. etc.

But definitely booze.

Butch:

I wouldn’t know. I made the mistake of encouraging my kids to do activities, and now I have nights like this where I have to pick them up, drive them to hell and gone, and sit in the car while they act in Beauty and the Beast until 5. And my spouse keeps working late.

At least I have games. And booze.

Feminina:

Games and booze will see us through!

Put your faith in games and booze, for they shall not fail you.

Sadly, you can’t enjoy them while sitting in the car waiting for your kids (unless you load Pokemon Go!), but at least their sweet promise is always present, giving you the strength to make it home.