No spoilers


OK, here’s something about games: Junior has embraced D&D with a mighty passion, and, as his brothers want to do what he does, so they want to play. Junior, being new to this, is not the best DM. One is still a slave to rules and shit at that stage. So I said “Ok, ok, ok, I’ll whip something up.” Then he convinced Mrs. McP to do it. Then he convinced NANA to do it, so we all can play in airports and shit.

Which sounds kinda fun, right? A three generation D&D campaign! A geek’s dream! But here’s the thing: how the hell do you come up with a story that appeals to all that? And here’s another rather major thing: When you’re used to the level of…maturity…that we got used to with D&D in college (I mean, like, rated M mature, not actual grown up behavior), how do you not let that slip? There’s ALWAYS a brothel! Right? It’s in the rules!

Who thought raising geeks would be this hard?


A 3-generation D&D game sounds pretty awesome, but also, as you note, tricky. Mr. O’ has run a couple of small adventures for O’Jr. that are basically “explore the ruined castle, find some treasure, fight some giant spiders”…very basic stuff. Maybe start with something along those lines and see where you get? Everyone likes an ancient ruined castle!

You can worry about the brothel once they get back to town. And maybe instead of a brothel it’s a game arcade. Only they play caravan and gwent instead of video games.


But will Mrs. McP and Nana like a dungeon crawl? I DON’T KNOW!

And as for the games, I think I’d rather have them play in brothel than get addicted to gwent. Gwent can wreck your life, man.


Mrs. McP will be fine as long as there are plenty of things to kill. We’re talking about the Bimm of Death here, remember. Or Olivia Worthington, the tweedy professor with the motorcycle and the shotgun. Just have them get into a fight every 20 feet and she’ll be happy.

I don’t know about your mom, though. Maybe also have some traps she could disarm if she likes to be sneaky? Or some occasional not-yet-hostile NPCs she can talk to if she likes to be conversational?

Dungeon crawls are underrated! There’s no reason they can’t have something for everyone!


My mother loves Game of Thrones, so she’ll probably want…mature themes.

I don’t know how I feel about that.

It is so cool to see a young player actually think they need to know every rule. Good times, good times.

If slightly annoying.


Every. Single. Rule.

Surely she’ll give you a pass on mature themes considering the children present. But if she likes Game of Thrones, then maybe have them uncover one or more plots to seize the throne while they’re poking around in the dungeon! There could be various clues to put together…maybe it turns out a trusted NPC who’s been helping them all along is actually planning to assassinate the king…maybe they’ll decide to help.

You never know what you’ll find in an old ruined castle that perhaps is a convenient meeting place for conspirators. As well as giant spiders that will attack you every 20 feet.


Nudity! That’s what.

Sadly, it looks like my mother will watch the kids a while so I have to go running. Yes, I ran some! Sprinted even!

This is so odd.


Easy there, man! Sprinting? Next thing you know you WILL be running marathons. Gee, THANKS mom.

Your Fitbit will love it, though. And think of the booze calories you’ve earned!

Plus long-term cardiovascular fitness blah blah.


Well, let’s not rush it. I was sore yesterday.

And now I’m in pain.

I don’t think I’m stretching enough. Or correctly. Or at all.

Stretching. It’s important, right? I think it is.


Well…according to my expert research, honed by long years of experience as a medical librarian, there’s actually no very good evidence that stretching before exercising helps increase strength, reduce injury, or limit soreness.

There’s a possibility that stretching AFTER exercise may be beneficial, since stretching on its own can be good and muscles are more pliable when they’ve been warmed up by exercise, but basically, stretch or don’t stretch according to whether or not you like to do it, not because it’s going to have any dramatic effect on performance or how sore you are afterwards.

The NHS has the scoop! https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/exercise/stretch-before-exercising

You’re probably sore because your muscles aren’t used to the work you’re making them do, and the only cure is to either stop (but then you don’t get extra booze calories!), or keep going until they get used to it.

Harsh but true.


But when I do stretch afterwards, like now, when I’m sore, it sure FEELS like something is stretching in there. It hurts. More. Which does beg the question as to why one would do it.

But dude: You used to be an Aikido master ballerina! You surely have experience with this that transcends even your librarian knowledge! What should I do?

Cuz MAN I’m sore right now.


I spent a lot of time wincing whenever I moved until it got to the point that it didn’t hurt anymore.

I think the first several weeks were the worst (so, right about now for you!). Just wince through it! You’re doing great! In a couple of months you’ll be able to work out without turning into a hobbling wreck afterwards. At least, it worked for me. About 25 years ago. (I don’t even want to think about the agony of trying to do that all that stuff again now.)

Also, obviously, even once you’re used to one thing, starting a NEW kind of exercise (like when we started working on wooden-swordplay!) would still make me sore in new places, because it made new and different muscles suddenly do work they weren’t used to. So if you kind of got used to walking briskly, and then you start running, you’re re-angering those muscles that were JUST heaving a big sigh and thinking “fine, this is what we do now” because now they have to work EVEN HARDER.

Angry muscles. It’s a thing. Just imagine them swearing at you whenever you move.

I never found that stretching helped with soreness, although sometimes rubbing the muscles can feel a little better. When I was REALLY sore, I’d take it easier the next workout to give myself a break (but don’t skip that workout, because keeping the muscles moving is good).

Maybe alternate walking-briskly days with running days for a while?

Ibuprofen was the go-to for taking the edge off–some people liked ice packs, although I never found them that helpful. But basically you just have to wince through it and it will eventually get better as you get stronger.

I mean, there are also actual injuries that can happen, if it feels not just sore but actively NOT RIGHT in some way like you twisted an ankle or wore all the skin off your feet or something, but probably you would know that.


Oh they’re angry. It’s all

BRAIN: lets go legs!
LEGS: fuck you brain. You’re not the boss of me.
BRAIN: heart and lungs are up for it!
LEGS: are they down here pounding the pavement? No? Then fuck them too.


Well put, legs.