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Puncherson_64LadyBrain_64

Some spoilers for early plot points in AC: Odyssey

Feminina:

All right, I returned to the main storyline, and immediately got to the part where I have to work for the Spartans in order to get close enough to the Wolf to assassinate him.

I’m not sure, though…was Elpenor, the guy who hired us to kill the Wolf of Sparta, himself an Athenian? Because you’re right that it seems pretty odd to kill a bunch of Athenians while attempting to help the Athenians by getting rid of the Spartan general (though war is a complex matter!), but I’m not sure Elpenor is actually on the Athenian SIDE, exactly. I think maybe he was just a merchant who was annoyed by the war’s interference with his trading, or something.

Anyway, you’re absolutely right, we’re now working for the Spartans, with a lot of question marks and much-more-reasonably-leveled challenges all around. I went and recovered a stolen wax tablet with some plans or something, and then I found a fort where I need to sneak in and burn some supplies, but I didn’t finish that. Apparently we’re supposed to weaken the entire region of Mageris to the point that the Spartans can take over? This “nation power” mechanic suggests we’re going to be basically taking over all the regions one by one until we rule Greece (ha, good luck, no one ever tried that!), but we’ll see how it goes.

Butch:

Ah, good. We’re at the same place. Main story wise, anyway. I cannot speak for side quests.

Told you there’d still be question marks.

Oh, right. I just assumed that he wanted Wolfie dead because war. But I just remembered….

This is AC game! Right? RIGHT!

So who the fuck knows. We certainly do know that bloodlines matter (no way that he hired her to kill her own dad by accident, cuz AC), weird alien shit happens, and people have motives, man. MOTIVES.

There was that line: Kassandra: “I’m not an assassin.” Him: “First time for everything.”

I mean, shit. Right? I’m right when I say I mean, shit.

It does suggest that we’re going to try to take over Greece, which makes me a tad nervous. It’s kinda reminiscent of Mafia 3, where you had to weaken dudes, kill the boss, take over the area over and over and that got tedious, didn’t it? I have a real fear that each zone will be “Destroy this, steal that, kill him, boss fight,” and that’s a lot of regions in which to do that. That bullshit distracted from the main story of Mafia 3 (which was a good main story), and I don’t want this game to fall into the same trap.

Feminina:

You’re right…there’s no way Elpenor just accidentally happened to hire the Wolf’s daughter to go kill the Wolf. There’s some larger plot in play here! Possibly involving aliens and/or French Canadians! It’s gonna be great.

And I did notice that the guy we talked to is the Wolf’s son, but his adopted son rather than Alexios…who I nevertheless still suspect is out there somewhere. We shall see. We’re gonna love it.

Butch:

I, too, expect Alexios.

Though I was thinking…

Kassandra and Alexios both had THEIR blood on that spear, right? Which means eventually they’re gonna get stabbed by it. Both of them. Right?

Feminina:

That is rather the implication. Sibling rivalry, man.

I mean, in theory there could be, say, skin cells from one of them worn into the wood, and blood from the other who got stabbed, but in practice…seems likely they’re both going to be getting stabbed at some point.

Or maybe they’re both wounded and bleeding and they collapse on top of the spear? I mean, there are countless scenarios that COULD explain it.

But somehow, one rather suspects they’re both going to get stabbed.

Butch:

Well, one of the necessary narrative conceits of all AC games is knowing that the person you’re playing is gonna die. This game takes place 3000 years ago or so, so even if Kassandra lived to be 97, she ain’t around today. Thus, her getting stabbed by the magical spear wouldn’t be all that surprising.

Nor would her becoming an assassin. There’s got to be a reason that the hipsters are looking at her. This isn’t some “Oh, hey, found this old spear, got some blood on it, wonder who it is?”

I played some to catch up.

Found that guy’s tablet. Found another tablet that says “a contract to kill someone. The description sounds a lot like you” (which, let’s face it, how can “Kill the hot ‘n’ sassy one NOT be me?” I kid, it doesn’t say that. Or does it?) Magpied. Found good loot. Found out, mercifully, that bandit camps are often Athenian, and raiding them lowers the defense thing. Killed, like, four dudes, got loot, lowered the meter.

Here’s a thing: You find any of those note things that pop up in “location objectives?” I’ve found a couple, and they seem like treasure maps, don’t they? Or, at least, treasure riddles? Haven’t made heads or tails of them. You?

Feminina:

Yeah, they definitely seemed specifically interested in this particular spear, hence presumably the particular people whose blood they expected to find on it.

Although honestly, with a murder tool, is that really the best approach? I mean, the thing exists to stab people. And as we see, it gets used for this A LOT. There’s going to be A LOT of peoples’ blood on it. I suppose our modern-day protagonists could be following up on ancient legends saying that the last people to be stabbed with this weapon were proto-Assassins or whatever, but otherwise, they could be digging up DNA from half of ancient Greece.

Hm.

Yes, I’ve found a couple of those notes. Also can’t make much of them. Perhaps it will be explained later.

Also, speaking of finding things, have you found any “aenigmata ostraka” or whatever? I see them on location objectives, but haven’t found any. Even the one back at Morkos’ vineyard. For shame.

Butch:

Well, hipster assistant did say “Hey, it was hard to isolate these two from everything on it.” There. Plot hole filled. Which I must point out because that’s likely the only time I’ll be able to say that in this game.

Dude, that’s exactly what I’m talking about! Those notes!

What did YOU find?

Feminina:

Oh, OK, then I haven’t found any. I found some random piece of parchment or something that showed up in my inventory.

Well, maybe once you get a lot of them, you can assemble them into some coherent directions to treasure?

Butch:

Nah, they’re all like, well, the one I just found is “It’s dangerous out there, so I don’t leave often. When I do, I go northwest of the battlefield in the occupied forest. There you will find me at the feet of the wine god himself!”

Like…..ok?

One was “Blah blah Odysseus went north from his temple and did…whatever…there you will find your reward on a slaughtered goat.”

So they seem to be little “find cool shit” riddles. I guess.

Ikaros will highlight them, like treasure chests. Next time you’re in a place with one, just eagle eye all around until he sees something that pops as a little scroll thingy. Or, he usually will. He seems to do a better job with it when they’re out in the open. Caves? Less so.

Feminina:

Ah, Ikaros. I need to use him more often. I think I did find one of those, then…definitely something with a cryptic little message, that showed up as a tablet-looking thing? And yeah, if it mentions ‘reward’ you figure there has to be treasure involved. I’ll…look into those. When I run out of question marks.

Butch:

Oh, dude. Ikaros is KEY. Love that birdie. I use him all the time.

Only annoyance is when I accidentally find the wrong quest. “Ah, there’s what I need.” Why is it surrounded by level 20 guys? You don’t need that yet! REALLY!

Just let Femmy deal with that shit.

Feminina:

Yeah! I’ll sneak right in there, steal the level 22 weapon from the chest, and run off! Completely useless mission accomplished!

Butch:

Well, at least your endgame won’t drag.

Game: Raid that camp!
Femmy: Done.
Game: Kill that guy!
Femmy: So ahead of you.
Game: Climb that mountain!
Femmy: What, that one I did on level six?
Game: Build that fence!
Femmy: ………….shit.

Feminina:

Siiiiiiigh…fine, I’ll build the fence. And feed the cows.

Freakin’ epilogues, man. RDR2 ruined the concept for everyone.

Butch:

Might as well just build the fence now. Though it’s likely a level 38 fence.

Feminina:

Hotmail’s suggested replies:

“That’s what I was thinking.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“That’s a good idea.”

So…yeah. I was thinking of that bad-good idea! I guess I’ll do it or not do it according to my hard-thought decision.

At least the level 38 fence should keep the damn boars off me. Seriously, I walked onto the shore and they attacked! That was really my first clue that the whole region was too tough for me.

The Pigs of Warning. “Come back later, you fool!”

Obviously, I ignored them. But they meant well! Trying to kill me was for my own good, really.

Butch:

HA! The pigs of warning.

Heed the pigs of warning!

T SHIRT!!!!

Maybe you just bumped into them. I’ve been trying SO HARD not to bump into anyone because RDR2 conditioned me to think the merest bump was an invitation to a gunfight. This is very difficult when there’s dudes EVERYWHERE. My damn boat! Like, where do they all sleep? Where do they all go to the bathroom?

Every time I bump I’m all “AIEE! NO I DON’T WANT TO FIGHT oh you’re cool.”

RDR, man. Made me neurotic.

Feminina:

Ha! So true.

“No, sorry, don’t attack I just–oh. Right. I’m the captain. OUT OF MY WAY, losers!”

Some earlier AC games had a mechanic where you had to walk carefully through the streets because they’d always be filled with people carrying boxes, and if you bumped them they’d instantly drop their boxes which would instantly shatter into crumbs, and then they’d be mad at you, and they wouldn’t attack you or anything, but if enough people were mad at you the guards would notice.

I certainly haven’t seen that here.

Ha…there would also be groups of minstrels in the cities that if they spotted you would run up and swarm around you, playing lutes and singing and potentially attracting the guards’ attention unless you flung some gold at them. Then in AC Brotherhood there was a storyline where you had to beat up some minstrels and steal their clothes and pretend to be a minstrel yourself, and Ezio said “minstrels…I’m going to enjoy this,” and it was totally awesome, because we all hated those damn minstrels and loved him for hating them too.

Good times, man. Good times.

Butch:

I remember them! I remember in AC4 you could use them and other crowds as cover!

Though the boxes are just weird.

Feminina:

Yes, hiding in crowds was a nice mechanic which doesn’t seem to be available here. Though the cities are in general much smaller and there aren’t really “crowds” in the same way, so I guess it sort of makes sense.

Butch:

“I’m hiding in this crowd of soldiers….so I can assassinate soldiers.”

“HEY! Who killed Kevin?”
“Dunno, boss.”
“Who’s that behind you, other Kevin?”
“Uh….not sure. But she sure is glowing blue.”
“Oh, well. Can’t see her then. Hey! Who killed other other Kevin?”

Feminina:

Alas, it was never quite that easy. I could only ever hide in crowds of civilians, and if you assassinate too many of them, you desynchronize.

Not that I’ve ever accidentally stabbed minstrels to death when I meant to throw them coins, or anything.

Butch: